A New Leaf
by alenya121
Summary: DON'T YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENED! CH. 12 IS HERE!As we know James plus Lily equals disaster. But what happens when one of Lily's best friends is plugged into the situation? Answer: debates on jam and jelly, dental hygene, and erotic Snape dreams MWPP
1. Prologue to a Final Year

Ch. 1: Prologue to the Final Year

Grace Sellers, a half-blood and really couldn't care less, lay in a half-daze. She could hardly believe what had happened that day. It had started innocently enough, waking at a decent hour, late enough to be well rested but early enough to not be rushed to catch the Hogwarts Express. She had met her best friend, Lily, and had reserved a compartment for them both and laughed when Kathleen got super hyped up on sugar and caffeine and had started dancing up and down the corridors.

Then, at the feast, she had been engaged in pleasant conversation with Lily and Remus about Greek mythology, something Lily had recently gotten her into. Grace had made some offhand comment about how it was unrealistic for the Greeks to picture all their women as outstandingly beautiful and witty. It was then that IT happened. Remus Lupin had told her that _she_ was one of the most beautiful and brilliant women he knew. She sighed just thinking about it. Of course, Sirius and James had screamed (_quite girl-like_ she thought) soon after, slightly ruining the fact. _But still_…Grace rolled over to face the opposite way and drifted off peacefully, a smile still on her face.

o.O

Kathleen Jamison, a Muggleborn and proud, thank you very much, and American-born to boot, was dead asleep. The previous night, she had not fallen asleep til one in the morning, due to a grueling dance competition her team had nearly won. And so, after smashing her alarm clock for ringing five times too many and after her mother had tore open her window curtains, screaming that she only had twenty minutes to catch the train, she had showered, dressed, packed, and jumped behind the wheel of her car before remembering she was seventeen and could Apparate. Therefore, at ten-fifty six, Kathleen was running toward the smoking train, trunk bouncing behind, she had boarded breathless, glaring at her laughing friends, Grace Sellers and Lily Evans.

Luckily for her mental sanity, the snack trolley came by shortly after and Kathleen O.D'd on butterbeer, chocolate frogs, and pumpkin pasties, making her incredibly hyper and dance down the corridor to the music in her head.

The feast paled in comparison. All that happened was that she managed to pour a goblet of ice down Sirius' and James' back, who sadly ruined the moment Remus and Grace were having two seats down by screaming profanities at the tops of their lungs.

o.O

Lily Evans, Muggleborn and wished people would stop harping on it, was sitting up, wide-awake. She knew she should get to sleep soon; after all, tomorrow she would be expected to wake up her friends and start her first day as Head Girl. With _Potter_.

Lily shuddered at the pure thought. Why was Potter a Head Boy? He didn't posses any Head-like qualities. He hadn't been a Prefect, like Remus. He wasn't responsible, like Remus. He was always acting up in class and getting detentions, unlike Remus. Okay, it was obvious; Remus would have been a better candidate in her mind. But there was no changing the past: James Potter was Head Boy.

_Perhaps Dumbledore is hoping I can knock some sense into him. After all, _she thought,_ I've knocked him _out_ enough_. Lily snickered. After Kathleen had started dancing down the corridors, she had somehow landed in James' compartment and James had been kind enough to return her (_Yeah right. James. Kind,_ Lily thought bitterly). This lead to a quick conversation about their summer (James had gone on holiday to France. Lily had stayed home) and Head duties, where Lily had threatened James not to abuse his powers, 'or else'. She wasn't quite sure what 'or else' meant, but the idea of cutting off his 'nads sounded appealing.

Apparently, Kathleen felt the need to enforce this threat by pouring ice down his back at the feast. She always could count on Kathleen for support. Even if it did slightly ruin the lovely comment Remus had just made to Grace.

o.O

Sirius Black, after cheerfully wishing everything in the room goodnight (which included his broom, Remus' cat, and Peter's boxers), he had jumped into his four-poster and whipped the curtains closed in one motion. He had done this nearly every night since first year and the curtains hadn't broken once, he was pleased to admit. He promptly fell asleep and began dreaming of Kathleen, his fellow Beater on the Quidditch team who had currently begun to haunt his nightly wanderings.

Kathleen had been doing the can-can in a tuxedo/bathing suit with tails and top hat while licking whipped cream off his stomach before a snork from Peter woke him sharply. Grumbling, he turned over and tried to fall back asleep. He noticed James was sitting up on his left and Remus was tossing fitfully on his right. Ignoring them, he thought about Kathleen again.

He was Sirius Black, slightly mad, mischievous, adorable Marauder who rarely dated. But Kathleen was starting to make him question his reputation as being unattainable. Early that day, he had spotted her dancing down the corridors, obviously very hyped up on sugar. She had returned a few seconds later to his compartment and collapsed between him and James and starting talking about Quidditch before passing out on his lap. Later, at the feast, he had made some rude comment about her dancing better when high on caffeine and she had poured ice down his back. _It's shameless the way we flirt_, he thought before drifting off.

o.O

Remus Lupin was turning over and over, trying desperately to get the embarrassing moment of the year out of his mind. The day had started pleasantly: he had met Lily on the train, who expressed her wish that he had made Head Boy, before joining James, Sirius, and Peter in their customary compartment. He had enjoyed a good book, a bar of chocolate, and the entertainment of a sugar-drunk dancing Kathleen. Then at the feast, he got into an intelligent conversation, a rarity with his mates, with Lily and Grace about Greek mythology. Grace had made some disparaging comment about herself not being pretty and smart. At least that's how he'd taken it. His mouth got ahead of his brain and he had blurted that she was one of the most beautiful and brilliant girls he had met. By the time his brain was caught up, saying she had only said it was unrealistic that a girl could be pretty and smart, Grace was blushing politely. Thankfully, Kathleen had just poured ice down James' and Sirius' backs and they started cursing; Grace and Lily looked away, letting Remus redden in peace.

Of course, he hadn't lied, which made the entire situation more embarrassing. He had liked Grace since fourth year, but had never been able to really do anything about it. He was too afraid of anyone finding out his 'furry little problem', as his mates liked to call it, to be serious about a non-platonic relationship.

o.O

James Potter was sitting up, wide-awake. He was looking at a piece of parchment he had been doodling absently on. He hadn't been able to sleep for two hours now, so he decided to try to come up with some new plays for the Gryffindor team. After all, it was his final year and he had to go out with a bang. He knew he had the two best Beaters in the school, if they weren't fighting (or flirting, depending on what you called it). He had had a new tactic for Kathleen and Sirius, but looking at the parchment, it was now a refection of his tormented teenage mind: a snitch with the initials LP practically carved into them.

_Lily Potter. Dear God_, James could almost hear Kathleen cluck. Kathleen was probably his best platonic girl friend, the one he went to with all his Lily problems, Sirius problems…okay, all his problems he couldn't really approach his mates with without annoying them. In turn, Kathleen knew all the guys' secrets, including Remus being a werewolf and the boys' being Animagi. She had known about his obsessive infatuation for Lily since third year when it began and since then, she had been a double agent for James, trying to get them together. But so far, nothing had worked.

James crumpled the parchment and tossed it under his bed. He got between his covers and tried again to fall asleep. He began to recollect that morning. He had traveled to King's Cross with Sirius, as tradition, and claimed their compartment early. He had then had a great time planning pranks with Sirius during the trip, until Kathleen came waltzing in, literally, and sat with them and the three of them talked about Quidditch, pranks, and other items. She soon passed out, both from lack of sleep and sugar low, and James had volunteered to take her back. Of course, this was only a ploy to talk to Lily.

The Heads' conversation started nicely with a talk about their summers, until Lily threatened him not to abuse his powers. Not that he planned to. One of the first things Kathleen had told him in his compartment was to stay on Lily's good side and be mature. Well, the very first thing was the reminder that this was his final year at Hogwarts and he had better shape up or he'd lose his chance with Lily. The second was that she was sick of doing all the work and he'd better stay on Lily's good side and be mature. James had every intention of doing just that. He really did love Lily.

o.O

Meanwhile, Peter Pettigrew snorked again. Sirius sleepily threw a pillow at him, stifling him. Pettigrew slept on, unperturbed by the pillow or his friends' troubled minds.


	2. Jam vs Jelly

Ch. 2: Jam vs. Jelly

The next morning, Lily woke at roughly 6:30 in the morning. She moaned softly, rolled over and was greeted by grey sunlight. She pointed her wand at her alarm clock and rolled over on her back, allowing herself to become fully alert before getting out of bed. Neither Grace or Kathleen were awake; Lily was the only seventh year Gryffindor girl who enjoyed getting up early, so she charmed her alarm to ring so only she could hear it. She reset it and charmed it so Grace and Kathleen would wake up in thirty minutes, gathered up her robes and shoes and silently crept out of the girls' dormitory.

Down in the common room, the remains of a half-party were laying stagnant. The lower classes had tried to throw a party at two in the morning, but Lily had busted them before it really got going. She climbed out of the portrait hole and up to the fifth floor. She leaned against a blank space of wall and muttered, _Flivverous_. The wall opened to reveal a scarlet and gold accented bathroom. Lily let her things drop to the marble floor and, picking up a fluffy white towel, she padded over to the swimming-pool sized tub and filled it with rose and vanilla scented foam and bubbles. Once the warm water filled the tub three-quarters of the way, she undressed and slipped in. She raised her wand and music started playing.

Sighing, Lily closed her eyes and sang along with the Queen song "I Want It All." The thing Lily had loved about being a prefect was the private bathroom all prefects had shared; now that she was Head Girl, however, she could enjoy her morning baths in unhurried peace in her own private bathroom. She soaked for a while before washing her hair and body. She swam a few lengths to rinse off and, after a bit more relaxing soaking, she hoisted herself out and wrapped the towel around her. She sat in a burgundy armchair and, pulling out the book hanging on the back of it, she began to read while she dried.

o.O

Meanwhile, in the boys' dormitory, Remus was pulling on his last shoe and calling to James to wake up. The raven-haired youth groaned, turned over and scowled at the bright sunlight. "Eurgh…" he said before burying his face in his pillow.

"Get up James, its seven thirty," Remus said gently.

"So?"

"Class starts at eight."

"Which means I've got another half hour of sleep left," James muttered.

"Breakfast…?"

"Ah, shit! Sirius, get up!"

o.O

Back at the bathroom – Lily had dressed and was walking back up to her bedroom. She was greeted with a cheerful Grace and a conscious, yet groggy Kathleen.

"She effing beat me for the last ten minutes," Kathleen scowled at Grace.

"You wouldn't get up!" Grace said in defense.

"That doesn't mean you threaten me with my own Beaters' bat!" Kathleen whined. "I'm going back to bed."

"No breakfast?" Lily asked.

"Mmm," said the lump of blankets that was Kathleen.

"Breakfast has coffee…" Lily tempted.

Kathleen turned over. "Coffee?" she asked interestedly. "Cheese Danish?"

"Possibly. But definitely toast."

Kathleen pouted slightly. "Okay, but no jam," she said as she got up.

o.O

"Sirius, you bloody mork, get up!"

James was currently pummeling Sirius with his pillow. Sirius had already caught Remus' and was currently curled up with it.

"Mmm," Sirius moaned, hugging the pillow tightly.

"Sirius!"

"Eh? Who'ryou?" One of Sirius' arms started swiping the air. "G'way! I…wubll…mumbhm…" Sirius mumbled unintelligibly. James managed to grab the waving arm and yanked Sirius roughly to his feet. His eyelids fluttered as Sirius swayed; two seconds later, he was down, still deep in slumber. James kicked the bed in frustration.

"Sirius, food!"

Sirius was suddenly awake. "Food?" he asked excitedly. Sirius was up and in the bathroom, gel and robes in hand. James turned to face Remus, who had said the last line.

"Good one," James complemented.

"Ah, I'm just used to waking you two up. Just mention food or girls and you're up," Remus grinned.

o.O

In the Great Hall, Lily sat reading the Daily Prophet and munching on a piece of bacon. Grace was buttering a piece of toast for Kathleen, who currently had her nose in her second cup of coffee.

"Mmm…caffeine…" Kathleen sighed contently.

"Don't overdo it," warned Lily.

"Do I ever?" Kathleen asked innocently

"Yes," Lily answered simply

"Quite often," added Grace, placing the toast on Kathleen's plate.

"Bitches," Kathleen said casually. She looked down at her toast and suddenly let out an ear-piercing scream. "I said NO JAM!" She flung the toast onto the table and began stabbing it repeatedly with her fork. "Bad, nasty, evil jam. Ruining perfectly good toast. Die, die, die, die…"

"Hey," Remus greeted the girls. He sat in the seat next to Grace, who looked immensely pleased at the seating arrangement. Kathleen stopped for a moment to acknowledge his presence, then returned to her toast mauling. "Who gave her jam?" he asked.

"Grace," Lily said, still reading.

"I'm sorry? Here, have my piece," Grace scraped her jam-ified toast clean and placed it on Kathleen's plate. Kathleen looked at it, then Grace, then at the toast. She put it on Sirius' plate, who had just slid in next to her.

"It was contaminated. It still had little…jammy-like particles on it," Kathleen said.

"Is _jammy-like_ a word?" Remus asked softly.

"No…" Kathleen said guiltily. Remus smiled gently; he never did like it when people started making up nonsensical words, like jammy-like.

"Well, I like it. Pass the jelly," Sirius asked. Kathleen quirked an eyebrow.

"The foul, disgusting fruity preserve that besmirches toasted bread is called _jam_, stupid," she seethed.

"Jelly," Sirius argued.

"Jam."

"Jelly."

"JAM!"

"JELLY!"

"Is there really a difference?" James asked. He was only half curious; the other half of him just wanted the bickering duo to stop.

"Not really," Remus said. "Jam is a preserve of fruit broiled with sugar. Jelly is a made from boiling fruit juice, sugar, and gelatin."

"That…and there's only strawberry jam here. Saying strawberry jelly is odd," Kathleen pointed out.

"What's weird about saying strawberry jelly!" Sirius asked indignantly.

"Too many similar syllables," said Kathleen.

"It just rolls off the tongue, though." Sirius closed his eyes. "Say it with me, James. _Straw_berry…jelly…Straw_berry_…_jelly_. It's like a fucking song!" he exclaimed. He began to sing and do a little dance in his seat. "Strawberry jelly. Strawberry jel-elly. Strawberry-y-y…jel-ly!"

"Oh, my God!" Lily ejaculated. "You two are arguing about breakfast. Kathleen, give Sirius the damn jelly so he'll shut up!"

"Ha! Lily agrees! It is jelly!" Sirius said triumphantly.

"Again, damn…jam…similar syllables. Damn jam sounds like a bad song. Worse than your jelly song, if that's possible."

"It's jelly. Admit it!"

"Fine. Random survey." Kathleen turned around and poked a Ravenclaw at the next table. He turned and Kathleen picked up the argued-over substance. "What is this?"

The Ravenclaw stuck his finger in it and tasted it. "Strawberry jam," he stated.

"HA! IN YOUR FACE, BLACK!" Kathleen yelled.

"SHUT UP ABOUT THE JAM!" Lily roared.

"And now Lily agrees with _me_," Kathleen stuck out her tongue.

"SHUT UP!"

Kathleen sulked. "Here's the jam," she said, very subdued. Sirius pushed it back.

"I don't want it now. It's contaminated. It's got Ravenclaw-y germs in it," Sirius pouted.

"Is Ravenclaw-y a word?" Remus asked.

"It _should_ be," Sirius fired back.

"Holy crap," Grace took the jam. "You two are insufferable." She spread the jam on her own toast, Kathleen and Sirius looking on it disgust. "Jam is good."

"_Three_ people," Kathleen whispered.

"KATHLEEN!"

Kathleen propped her cheek on her fist. "Pass the Cheese Danish."

o.O

Promptly after breakfast, James pulled Kathleen aside.

"What the hell was that at breakfast?" James asked.

"Did you miss the entire conversation? It was strawberry _jam_!"

"I meant you driving Lily to the point of insanity."

"I didn't do that. At least, not alone."

"What do you mean?"

"If I were you, I'd have a nice, talk with your bum buddy Padfoot. If he didn't have the audacity to call the disgusting substance that is jam jelly, Lily wouldn't have yelled."

"It's jelly and you know it, Jamison," Sirius piped in.

"What have I told you about eavesdropping, Padfoot?" Remus asked at Sirius' elbow. Sirius' face screwed up in concentration. "While you ponder that, we'll go to Potions." James watched Remus drag Sirius to class, who was still thinking hard. When James faced Kathleen again, she was still watching the pair.

"That boy is crazy," she murmured. James chose to ignore this comment, as it had no relevance to Lily. Kathleen faced James with a serious face. "James, you have to trust me. You and I are used to Sirius' crazy moods, but Lily has almost no tolerance for pointless rambling, which is what our whole jam/jelly discussion was…which I, of course, totally dominated, and…what's that weird glow from your bag?"

James dug around inside and pulled out the two-way mirror he shared with Sirius. Sirius had apparently called him and was now moving the mirror spastically, obviously keeping it away from someone.

"I just remembered!" Sirius yelled. He intertwined his fingers and put them on his lap. "'Dropping eaves is very rude/Quite simply, it's just mean/As punishment for doing so/May Snivellus haunt my dreams!'" he recited proudly. "Shit! Remus, was that a spell? Aw, damn…" Sirius cursed. "Any_who_, I just wanted to tell Kathleen that she did not win. _Four_ others in class said it was strawberry jelly, not jam, and her whole similar syllables thing is crap. Bye!" The mirror went blank.

"So, like I was saying, you might want to tell Sirius to back off when around Lily. It'll keep her in a better mood. Oh, and if you want to remind him that he is a relentless prat who doesn't know a preserve from a gelatin, that's perfectly fine with me," Kathleen finished.

o.O

In Potions, Sirius had dropped the jelly argument and instead spent the entire period moaning about Remus' cruel punishment.

"Now instead of dreaming of pleasant things, I'll be dreaming of Snivelly's grimy drawers and greaseball hair!" Sirius tried to drown himself again in his cauldron, but was caught promptly by James, who planned to take the opportunity to talk to his best mate.

"New subject time. About this morning…" James started.

"And nasty snide marks about people who are better than him!"

"At breakfast…"

"And his stupid Potions fixation!"

"With the jelly…"

"_Five_! Beat that, Jamison!" Sirius yelled at the brunette, who was currently deep in conversation with Lily. "Damn, she didn't hear me…HEY JAMIS ––!" Sirius started to yell, but James quickly covered Sirius' mouth.

"Concentrate, Padfoot! _Honestly_…" James muttered. Sirius said something, but it all came out muffled. "Shut up. Now, I know the reverse spell, so you won't have to go though Remus' torture. But you have to do everything I tell you to, okay?" Sirius nodded violently. "Now, I'm going to remove my hand and you'd better drop this stupid war with Kathleen about jam and jelly. You will listen to me in entirety without saying anything. One peep and consider the deal off, okay?" This time it was a while before Sirius nodded. James removed his hand.

"I talked to Kathleen with every intention to tell her off for making Lily yell. She told me to tell you that you need to back off." Sirius had every intention to interject here, but remembered the reward and closed his mouth. James continued, "She said Lily has almost no patience for rambling. Now, I don't agree with her entirely, but right now, I'm desperate. This is my last chance to date Lily and I'm not taking any chances. So this is me asking as nicely as possible to please try to watch your craziness around Lily." A great silence settled over the boys. Sirius looked like he was about to burst. "You can talk now," James said.

"Lily and Kathleen have you wrapped around their finger," Sirius blurted.

o.O

"Lily, I said I was sorry!"

Lily was slicing her seedpod in fuming silence. Honestly, she wasn't sure why she was so angry with Kathleen right now. Maybe it was the fact that she and Sirius were seventeen and acted like they were ten. Maybe it was the fact that she had no sleep and was stressed about the first day back. Or maybe it was the fact that Kathleen and Grace had obviously found someone to flirt with and Lily was stuck on her own.

"Lily, aren't you going to talk?"

Lily looked at Kathleen. The brunette was looking very pitiful, her blue-grey eyes nearly filled with tears of apology. Lily's mood softened slightly; Kathleen really was a caring girl who was very aware when people around here were feeling bad. She almost always put others before herself and felt very bad when anyone was annoyed with her, especially her best friends. Lily managed a smiled. Kathleen wasn't that immature, just Sirius.

"Sorry," Lily sighed. "Sirius was just being a bit too exuberant for me this morning."

"Maybe _you_ should have had some of my coffee," Kathleen grinned. Lily laughed as she continued. "But I totally understand if you're mad at me. I went a bit overboard myself, really. But you know I never can give up a contest. Especially with Sirius!"

"That's the truth," Lily snorted. "Are you sure you don't like him?"

"No, of course not!" Kathleen said, frowning. She grabbed her scales and started loading beetle's eyes onto one of the sides. But Lily had noticed something behind that frown that made her doubt the full validity of that statement.

"HEY, JAMIS ––!" Lily heard Sirius shout. She looked over quickly and saw James quickly muffle Sirius with his hand. Kathleen glanced over quickly, gave a quick snicker, and returned to work. Lily smiled grimly. The latter of her conclusions for her actions that morning was starting to look the most likely: Kathleen had found interest in her fellow Quidditch player, Grace was going for fellow bookworm Remus, and Lily was stuck on her own.

o.O

A/N: go review and I'll post again soon.


	3. Fall Ball

_smiles and giggles as she reads reviews _You love me! You really love me! I so happy you find me funny! All three people who reviewed...

Quick response to reviewers (because they rock!)

**whiskygurl007:** I totally agree with you. Its jam all the way, no matter what Sirius thinks. Hope your mom doesn't think you've gone psycho or anything. Am very flattered you were laughing so hard to make her think that tho!

**ravenclawroyalty**: glad I'm so amusing! _swoons over all the adoration_ Kathleen's actually my fav character to write, other than Sirius and Lily. Here's your update!

**Zepplin Girl**: _gasp_ let me just say how much I absolutely LURVE led zeppelin! Glad I'm a fav! Here's an update!

And a quick shout-out to my buddy and psudo-beta Claire! of course you're my favorite hyper short person, even if you do scare me at times. Love ya, Llama-Cat. And I want my bloody floppy!

I forgot last time: I do not, nor will I ever despite how many times I wish, own anything Harry Potter. Except Grace and Kathleen. They're mine. No touchie.

I also don't own anything 'Phantom of the Opera' either. Except the soundtrack which rocks hard tasty abs, washerboard style!

o.O

Ch. 3: Fall Ball

The next day in Transfiguration, Lily, Kathleen, and Grace managed to pair up in a super-trio, especially since Grace rocked the pants at Transfiguration and Lily…well, she'd rather be snogged by Lucius, Snape, and Potter. Although the latter didn't seem as bad as the former two. _He does have nice eyes. Beautiful, brown…_

"Ow!" Kathleen shrieked. Lily had been trying to transfigure herself into a deer, but while her mind had been wandering, her wand tip had migrated toward Kathleen. Now she was gingerly massaging her temples, trying to avoid the antlers that had sprouted.

"Sorry!" Lily squeaked out, her face turning nearly the same color as her hair. Grace, however, was looking at the great prongs in slight awe.

"Impressive," she said, feeling the velvety-brown covering. "You haven't matured fully, have you? Well, judging from your little episode from breakfast, I would expect no less!" she giggled.

"I'm not _supposed_ to have antlers. I'm a girl," Kathleen said bitterly.

"You look good as a deer," Sirius spoke up. Kathleen turned slowly, dangerously and looked at him, eyes narrowed to slits. "No, usually deer have wider eyes. Like when they're looking into a bright light?" Sirius demonstrated, looking a lot like a fish on speed.

"How the _fuck_ do you handle these things, Potter?" Kathleen said in quiet, measured tones. "They hurt like a ––!"

"Jamison!" McGonnagall snapped. Kathleen whipped around quickly, forcing Grace and Lily to duck quickly to avoid a concussion. "Stop talking and finish transfiguring yourself."

"But, professor!" Kathleen whined.

"I don't want to hear excuses!" McGonnagall said.

"Professor, I've got ––!"

"Don't make me give you detention!"

"I've got effing _antlers_ sticking out my bloody head!" Kathleen yelled.

McGonnagall's mouth went dangerously thin. "Language, Jamison. The antlers are a good start, but if you are becoming a deer, you might want to grow a few more legs to pass."

"But I wasn't ––!"

"Detention, Miss Jamison! Friday night, this classroom. It sounds as if you need more practice on this charm."

Kathleen opened her mouth to argue further, but Lily kicked her in the shin.

"It was I, Professor. I accidentally pointed my wand at Kathleen when I was trying to Transfigure into a deer. Kathleen was going for an eagle."

McGonnagall was silent. The cogs were working overtime in her brain. _Should I apologize or let the detention stand?_ The professor thought. "Lily, see me after class. You too, Potter."

"What!" James squawked. "What'd I do? Lily's the remedial one!" _Fuck. Shit, damn, double fuck. How the hell did that get out? _

Lily leapt up, all ready to pounce over the table and mash Potter to a pulp, but Grace and Kathleen held her back. The rest of the class was laughing and catcalling. It took three bangs from McGonnagall's wand to restore peace.

"After class, Mr. Potter," she seethed. "Back to work."

"Professor, the antlers!" Kathleen whined.

"I've got it," Sirius said, pointing his wand at Kathleen's head. Kathleen yelped and hid behind Grace, making the blond look like she had grown two extra limbs.

"He'll give me brain damage! Grace, you do it," Kathleen commanded. Grace obliged and Kathleen sighed, feeling the weight be lifted and her headache disappear. "Thank you," she sighed.

"No problem," Grace shrugged. She looked over at Remus, who had been watching the entire scene play out from behind his eyebrows. The boy tinged pink before becoming a grey wolf. Grace smiled to herself, happy he had noticed her. Lately, it seemed Lupin was getting even more scraggly and worn, the bags under his eyes growing darker. She was worried; he hadn't really talked to her since the feast and whenever she came round, Lupin seemed to disappear either behind James or Sirius or behind a book. _Did he not mean what he said?_ She was beginning to wonder.

Remus turned back to his human form and, after getting complements for his efforts from McGonnagall, began packing his things up. He noticed Grace looking off into space, her crystalline blue eyes full of worry. He sighed to himself. He was still feeling embarrassed about what he said two days ago to her. _Stupid blurting. Damn my downfalls_, he thought bitterly. It was getting near full moon and he was beginning to feel stretched and tired. It showed too; he was getting so paranoid that either Lily or she would find out his secret and have nothing to do with him. He had taken to concealing himself as much as possible whenever she came up to him, but the sad looks that Grace constantly had were working his heart. He had told Sirius all this and all he had gotten in return was a forceful slap on the back, meant to be fond he figured, and a promise that a raucous full moon outing would put him right.

Kathleen was silently watching Remus and Grace steal looks at each other, every time just missing the other. She smiled softly. _Why don't they just kiss and get it over with?_ She thought. _Note to self: Must think up possible situations to force Moony and Grace together._

Sirius was looking absently around the room, looking haughtily bored, as was his custom. He nodded at the coy look some of the girls in the room were flashing him until his eyes landed on Kathleen. She was looking intently at Remus and Grace, her eyes flicking between the two. Her head was propped on the heel of her hand and her curled fingers disguised an amused smile. Sirius noticed a faint dimple on her right cheek. Shaking his head, he Transfigured quickly into the familiar form of the shaggy black dog. He heard McGonnagall praise him somewhat reluctantly and saw Kathleen flash him a look that clearly said, 'you cheat. I'm still irritated about the deer comment.' Still in his dog form, he panted and gave a small woof.

"Sirius, don't use shortcuts," Remus muttered.

"You mean being Animagi, we don't have to fiddle with this curse?" Peter said excitedly.

"Shut up, Wormtail!" Sirius said, back in his human form. "If you don't announce it to the whole class, then why not?"

"Sweet!" the boy said, turning quickly into a rat.

"I dunno," James said, stealing a glance at a struggling Lily.

"Aw, c'mon. If you do it, she may ask you for pointers," Sirius prodded.

"But I don't want to look like I'm showing off," James pointed out.

"Just do it," pleaded Sirius.

"I wouldn't," Remus said.

"Do it."

"You never know what kind of mood she's in right now."

James attempted to compromise and instead ended up with antlers out his head. "FUCK!" he yelled.

"Taking tips from Kathleen now, are we?" Grace piped up. Lily looked up from her coach and saw James smacking his head on his desk, two antlers intruding on Sirius' and Remus' workspaces. She tried to hold in her laughter, but it burst out in a guffaw that progressed into near hyperventilation. Beside her, Kathleen was having better success holding in her amusement. She only managed one word: "Smooth." McGonnagall, however, had another word for what happened.

"Detention. You can have Kathleen's extra practice," the thin-lipped professor said. "In that time, you may learn that explicit language has no relevance to this class."

The bell rang and James, grumbling, removed his horns, threw his things in his bag and made for the door. McGonnagall cleared her throat. "Has your inappropriate language choices made you lose your short-term memory?"

"I should think so," Lily muttered to herself. She was fully packed and sitting in the front most seat.

"Oh," James said subdued. He dropped his bag and sat next to Lily.

"Must you be there?" Lily snapped.

"Sorry," he said, still depressed. Lily was shocked to hear a different tone than his usual snobbish, cocky one.

"If you two are quite done," McGonnagall interrupted Lily's thoughts. "Don't worry, Miss Evans. You aren't in trouble. This has to do with Head duties."

Lily exhaled heavily in relief; she had been panicking to Grace and Kathleen ever since McGonnagall had called her down. "What is it, Professor?"

"It's the matter of the Fall Ball and the Farewell. Traditionally, the seventh years have two dances, one in the fall and one a few weeks before N.E.W.T.'s. The school provides food, drinks, and the premises, but the Heads are responsible for the date, music, room arrangement and decorations, and themes. Dumbledore has told me that he would like a basic idea from you by the end of next week and definite plans by the end of the month so the word can get spread. Do you understand?"

James nodded, but Lily was excited. She had known about the prestigious seventh-year dances; Kathleen had been escorted last year to the Fall Ball and praised it for weeks after. Lily was incredibly excited to hear that the Heads got to organize it all, but less happy about the fact that James would be helping her. _Oh well_, she had rationalized, _he'd probably be too busy planning pranks to deal with many of the plans._ She planned to ask Kathleen and Grace for their input at their yearly first weekend girls'-night-in party.

"If there are no questions, you two are excused. Remember, I want a theme by next week," McGonnagall said. Lily snatched up her bag and ran out, running into Kathleen and Sirius, who had their ears glued to the door.

"Ay," Kathleen said, arching her back, "Sirius, you owe me five Sickles."

"What?" Lily asked as Sirius forked over the silver.

"He bet you were in trouble and judging by the ecstatic look on your face, either James died or I won."

"I get to plan the Fall Ball!" Lily squealed.

Kathleen gasped. "Holy crap!" she screamed. "No effing way!"

"Me too," James spoke up. Both girls ignored him.

"What's the theme?" Grace said, draw over. She was growing excited too.

"I don't know yet. We'll discuss it this weekend. Do I have you two's help?" Lily asked, knowing the answer.

"Yes!" the girls said in unison.

"And mine. You have my help, too," James reminded. Lily glanced at him and Kathleen made a slashing motion across her throat. James shut up. Lily and Grace walked off, Kathleen hanging around.

"Have fun at detention," she said to James. "Don't worry about the whole dance thing. You'll have a say. Lily's just been really excited about planning this dance ever since she found out it was a Head Girl responsibility. She'll calm down and, before you know it, you'll have more responsibilities than you know what to do with."

"Yay?" James said.

"Yay," Kathleen said.

"Yay!" Sirius said enthusiastically. Kathleen waved goodbye and ran after her friends.

o.O

"What 'bout Thanksgiving?"

"We're in England, Kathleen. We don't have Thanksgiving."

"Oh. Yeah." Pause. "Shame. I could really go for some turkey right now."

Silence.

"What about a Halloween theme?" Grace said.

Friday night had arrived and the girls were assembled in their dorm. Lily and Kathleen were on Lily's bed, Lily leaning on the window and Kathleen lying upside down off the side. Grace was on the floor, braiding Kathleen's hair. A pile of sweet wrappers lay to Grace's right and another pile of uneaten sweets sat between Lily and Kathleen. A while ago, Kathleen had disappeared and appeared three-quarters of an hour later, her schoolbag filled with treats from Hogsmeade. No one questioned where they came from: they knew she wouldn't tell. The conversation had gone from gossip to dissing their teachers and the Slytherins to possible pranks on the Marauders to the Fall Ball.

"Halloween was last year," Kathleen said. "It was amazing. All the seventh years had their own gravestone with their name and custom epitaph on it. The ghosts ran the entertainment. The Fat Friar did a comedy routine, Nick did a dramatic reading and reenactment of his botched beheading, there was a pool to guess what the stuff all over the Bloody Baron was, and the finale was some synchronized flying. There was even trick-or-treating to different classrooms!"

"You've told us before," Lily gently reminded. She massaged her temples; the pressure on her was mounting. The rest of the class had remembered that she and James were planning the dance. Apparently, they all figured she was in charge because not an hour went by without someone trying to pump her for information. Finally, James had appointed himself bouncer, making sure no one bothered her too much. Lily had noticed that he had stopped being so cocky and obnoxious lately. He hadn't put anyone in the hospital wing lately and so far he only had one detention. _Maybe he _is_ maturing finally_, Lily thought hopefully. _Don't count on it, _that annoying voice in the back of her mindsneered.

"I know!" Kathleen blurted. "A masquerade!"

Lily perked up. The girls had put on some music earlier. Currently, the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack was playing and 'Masquerade' had just switched on.

"A masquerade?" Lily asked.

"Paper faces on parade!" Grace sang.

"It'd be like a costume party! Like Muggle Halloween without the trick-or-treating," Kathleen explained.

"Only to be a real masquerade, no one could know who anyone is," Lily said. "How'd we prevent people from telling their friends what they're going as?"

"Charm them!" Grace exclaimed.

"Isn't that a bit crude?" Lily asked.

"No. See, when they bought their costumes, they'd be swore to secrecy and unable to tell anyone what they're going as."

"We could even charm the room so that no one spoke in their normal voice!" Kathleen said.

"And everyone would wear masks. And at midnight, everyone could remove their masks and the curses would lift!" Lily said, getting into the idea. "Kathleen, you're brilliant!"

"Oh, I know," she said, flipping her hair back. Lily chucked a pillow at her. Kathleen sat up quickly and returned fire. It escalated into a full-blown pillow fight, filled with shrieks of laughter.

o.O

The next morning, Lily filled in James about Kathleen's idea.

"I don't know," James said. He had kind of been hoping, when Lily said it was Kathleen's idea, that it was the brunette's plan to get them together. But the idea of concealed identities seemed full of possible problems.

"You know it's the best idea. Unless you can come up with anything better," Lily snapped. James noticed the change in tone.

"Give me a while to think it over. I'll let you know next period free."

Lily shrugged. She was sure that James couldn't come up with anything else. _Nasty, cocky, snot-faced, pricky prat that he was_, Lily cursed out of habit.

Right after breakfast, Kathleen, James, and Sirius had Divination and Lily, Remus, Grace, and Peter had Arithmancy and Muggle Studies respectively. The seven said their goodbyes and Kathleen followed the boys to the Divination tower. Once on their own, James excused himself and Kathleen and the two started walking ahead of Sirius.

"This masquerade…" James started.

"It's effing brilliant, isn't it?" Kathleen said, pleased with herself.

"I don't know. How is this supposed to help me get Lily?"

"What makes you think this is a ploy for _you_ to get a girl? Maybe I want a guy and this is a way for me to get him," said Kathleen. James looked confused, until Kathleen gave a short breathy laugh. "Of course it's for you and Lily," she assured him.

"But if I don't know what her costume is, how am I supposed to make a move on her?" James asked.

"You don't," Kathleen stated softly. James stopped walking. Kathleen glanced behind to see how close Sirius was, and pulled James back up to pace. "Trust me. You two are going to be putting in a lot of hours on this dance. Sterling…you know the Ravenclaw Captain who took me to last year's Fall Ball?" James nodded; he knew Sterling, but didn't like him much. Sirius hated him. "Well, he organized the dance and told me how much work it takes. If you treat her well and be civil during the planning time, she will have already started changing her outlook on you. And come end of October, or whenever you plan to hold this shindig, you two will probably find each other on your own and then you can flirt. But only a little."

"But that's so _complicated_," James whined. "Can't you just bend the rules for me and tell me what Lily goes as?"

"No," Kathleen scolded. "Just do as I say and keep being nice to Lily."

"Fine," James sulked slightly.

"Are we done here?" Kathleen asked, slowing her pace slightly.

"For now," James said.

o.O

Sirius was looking forward to a period of goofing off with Sirius, making fun of Trelawny, and mild flirting with Kathleen. But when James went off with her, his hopes died slightly.

Kathleen was a very pretty, smart, and outgoing girl. Sirius knew very well that many of the male population had their eye on her, judging by the number of past boyfriends she had had since she moved to Hogwarts in third year. Most of her relationships fizzled out over inter-House Quidditch games; Kathleen had always but Quidditch before everything else, so Sirius never felt too worried. But James…

_No, he likes Lily_, he said to himself. _This is probably about Lily. After all, Kathleen is helping him get her_.

_Ah, but what if her plan includes making Lily jealous by pretending to date him_, another voice popped in.

_She wouldn't do that_, Sirius thought. He saw Kathleen turn quickly, then quicken her pace, making him doubt himself.

o.O

A/N: hmm…a little bit of drama, a tad of humor, slight cliffie…what do you think? (hint: reviews make me post faster!)

Now, before I get any flames, let me just say, I am NOT a fan of Mary Sues or out-of-the-blue balls! The masquerade plays a huge part in this fic, you'll see.

Now, see that purple rectangular box in the left corner? It's your best friend in the world. Go click it.

Now.

Obscure Topic to add in your Review: soundtracks to musicals. I just went to go see Mamma Mia for the second time! if you haven't seen it yet, go see if its coming anywhere near you. It's effing hilarious.

oh, and if you've gone on my profile, you'll see that i'm also writing my first ever attempt at angst. tell me what you think please! should i just stick to humor?


	4. Preliminary Planning

Hello again readers! This will probably be the last time I post for a while because school starts for me tomorrow. Gah, can't believe it! And between sporadic marching practice, football games, and band competitions…not to mention me and my friend will be practicing for theater competitions and teching all the fall shows my school is doing, plus the immense workload my AP classes will dump on me (precal first thing in the morning! Who planned that?), I don't know how much time I will have to write. So, I'm updating all my stories while I still can.

Shout-outs to reviews will be at the end of the chapter, so you can skip over them if you like.

Disclaimer: Let's face it, JK Rowling would never be writing the same kinda stuff I do. And even if she did, do you really think she'd post it as fanfiction? Conclusion: I'm a lowly amateur writer.

o.O

Ch. 4: Preliminary Planning

And so during free period right after second, it was with mixed emotions that James told Lily that the masquerade was a great idea.

"Perfect!" the redhead squealed. "When do you want to tell McGonnagall?"

"Now?" James shrugged.

"But she'll probably have questions on how we'll fully conceal everyone's identity. I mean, the whole charm thing is great in theory, but unless there's an actual charm in existence…" Lily mulled.

"I smell a trip to the library!" Grace said, not looking up from her Muggle Studies essay.

"Great idea, Grace!" Lily gathered up her bag and took off toward the portrait hole. James watched her go, feeling very forgotten, until he felt a sharp pain in his upper arm: Kathleen had elbowed him forcefully.

"Ow! What?" he asked.

"Go after her," Kathleen hissed.

"What?"

"Help her!"

"Oh," James ran after, trying to shoulder his bag while shouting for her to stop. Kathleen watched him in amusement. Sighing, she stretched out her legs (she had been sitting cross-legged between James and Sirius on the overstuffed couch in the common room), moved to one side, and resettled down to finish her Ancient Ruins work.

"What?" Sirius asked. Kathleen looked up to meet Sirius' dark brown eyes.

"Nothing," she said, looking confused.

"That was a rather heavy sigh for nothing," he pointed out.

"That boy is a hoot and a half," Kathleen chuckled. "And Ruins is tedious."

"Yeah," Sirius trailed. His mind flitted over the jealousy idea again, but repressed it quickly. He watched her work intently for a moment longer, finding amusement in her quiet muttering in some ancient language.

o.O

"Lily!" James panted. He had chased her though two secret passages before managing to catch the strap of her bag. She turned, looking slightly taken aback that James was trailing her.

"You don't have to come," Lily said.

"Yes, I do," James said, breathlessly. "I mean," he said, reviewing his comment again, "I'm responsible for half of this dance and I want to do my part. Not just fend off annoying, nosy busybodies for you."

Lily smiled. "All right," she said. The two walked the rest of the way to the library in silence. "Find a table and I'll talk to Madam Pince."

"You want me to talk to her?" James asked.

"She hates you," Lily said.

"Oh, yeah. Jeez, come in one time after a muddy Quidditch practice and you're a bloody felon," James muttered acidly, walking off to claim a table.

Lily actually laughed that time. She had never really noticed James' funny comments and one-liners. In the past, the only time James ever really talked to her was to ask her out or tease her. The other times she had heard him talk were to talk back to teachers, show off, or curse some innocent passerby. She gave another short laugh before walking up to the main desk.

Ten minutes later, after much impatient drumming on the table, James saw Lily walking carefully toward him, her arms piled high with teetering volumes. He jumped up and took half. Lily's pink face was visible now and she was smiling in relief.

"Thank you," she breathed.

"Not at all. These are _all_ on silent charms?" James asked disbelieving. He had barely known this many books existed.

"They didn't have any on just silence or voice changing charms. So Madam Pince just picked out the volumes of charm books," Lily explained.

"Wow," James managed. Lily smiled and handed him a particularly thick volume entitled 'Random Charms and Their Random Uses'.

"Let's get started," she said.

The duo spent the next hour with their noses in books, speaking only when they found something of relevance.

"Here's one. Voice changing. Oh, wait. That's to keep a guy's voice from cracking. Lemme write that down for Peter…"

"Here's a Silence Charm. That's stupid, we still want people to talk."

"What about a Selective Silence Charm? Do they even have Selective Silence Charms?" A silence, frustrated flipping of page. "Dear god, what's the point of discussing the pros and cons of a curse without giving the damn incantation!"

Before next period, James and Lily had sorted through all the books into ones they thought would be helpful and those that were complete rubbish. They left the rubbish ones on the tables, Lily asked Madam Pince to hold onto the relevant ones, and they rushed off to Herbology. They explained breathlessly that they were working on the plans for the dance to Professor Sprout, who understood, and sat down beside Sirius, Remus, Peter, Grace, and Kathleen.

"You two were gone for a while? What'd you do?" Sirius waggled his eyebrows suggestively. He received a swift elbow from Remus and Grace and a slap on the back of the head from Kathleen.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" Remus asked.

"Not really. The books helped, though," Lily said. "we're going back during lunch."

"We are?" James blurted.

"Yes," Lily stated.

"What about tonight?" James suggested.

"I need to finish my homework."

"What about tomorrow?" James asked. "Damn, that's Quidditch trials. Monday? Ack, Quidditch again! Tuesday?"

"James, we're going at lunch," Lily said.

"But ––" James started to protest, but cut off with a look from Kathleen. "Okay."

"Alright, pair up!" Professor Sprout clapped her hands "Fourteen pairs of two, please. And be careful!"

"Lily, pair with me?" James asked. Lily, who had automatically moved toward Kathleen, looked shocked. "So we can plan a bit more."

"O-kay," Lily said, sharing a frown with Kathleen. But Kathleen's face cleared to a warning look as she caught James' sleeve.

"Watch…yourself…" she whispered.

"Always," James nodded. Kathleen let him go. Sirius came to stand by her.

"Be my partner?" he asked.

"All right," Kathleen said, frowning at James. She and Sirius collected a plant and pot and began working.

"So…you and James?" Sirius ventured after a long silence. Kathleen looked up quickly.

"What about me and him?" she asked.

"What's going on between you two?" he prodded.

"Nothing…"

"_Kathleen_…"

"_Sirius_…"

Sirius sighed. "You're going to make me say it, aren't you?" he asked, pained. It was bad enough thinking it, but actually saying it to her?

"Considering I have no idea what you're insinuating, yes."

"You know," Sirius started. He moved over closer to her. He could smell her cucumber melon body spray and see every individual eyelash framing her big blue eyes that were focused on him. _Focus, Padfoot_, he told himself. "You two aren't…romantically involved?"

Kathleen's laugh sounded incredibly loud in his ear. "Oh, my goodness, no!" she cried.

"What happened?" Professor Sprout came over worried. "Why are you crying, Jamison?" Most of the class was looking at the hysterical Kathleen and slightly embarrassed, but cool, Sirius.

"I'm-I'm not," Kathleen said, pressing her cool fingers to her eyelids. "Everything's fine, Professor." She lingered for a moment, doubtful, before moving onto Grace and Remus. Kathleen lowered her voice. "I could never think of James like that. He likes my best friend. The only relationship I have with James, besides strictly platonic, is my double agent role."

"You sure you are planning to go out with him to make Lily jealous?" Sirius was already breathing easier.

"Like that would work. Lily already thinks I'm crazy for being friends with you and him. Imagine if I _dated_ one of you," she laughed.

"Yeah," Sirius laughed too, only slightly hesitantly.

o.O

James sat sulking in the library. His stomach growled for what seemed the umpteenth time. He moaned slightly, thinking of his mates happily stuffing themselves with food. He flicked the pages of his book absentmindedly. Drumming his fingers on the open page, he watched Lily with bored interest.

It was one of his old habits, watching Lily in class, in the common room, during prefect meetings, while she was eating, laughing, talking, walking, reading, breathing, staring thoughtfully out the window, cursing the shit out of him…

Currently, she was studying, one of his favorite times of observation. Her eyes would flick across the page, searching for what they want, her tiny fingers impatiently flipping pages, the little pout and furrowed brow that formed when a fact was eluding her and the charming, self-sufficient smile that appeared when she was happy. Right now, it was the former that was dominant. Her eyes were on the book and, every once in a while, her right hand would blindly scribble something on a piece of parchment. She glanced up, then did a double take.

"You're not working," Lily said, disapproving.

"I'm hungry. I can't concentrate when I'm hungry," James stated, on edge.

"There's no eating in the library. Pince will kill you," Lily said, not paying attention.

"I _know_. That's why I didn't what to come during lunch."

"Then go eat."

James paused; in his history with girls, he knew they didn't always mean exactly what they said. "What?"

Lily looked up for a moment, her hand still writing. "Go eat. If it's that important to you."

"I don't want to leave you here."

"I'm not that hungry. I'd rather keep working."

"Then I will too," James settled back down. He noticed Lily looked annoyed at him.

"If you're just going to sit there and complain and do nothing, then I don't want you here," she sighed.

James sat there for a minute, debating. Finally, he reached into his bag, pulled out something, and put it in his robes. "If you're done with that one, I'll shelve it," he pointed to a book laying on the edge of the table. Lily waved him away.

He nearly ran to the back of the library. Setting the book on an empty space of shelf, he pulled out his two-way mirror that he had grabbed. "Sirius Black," he whispered to it. His reflection turned fuzzy silver then black; Sirius' mirror was in his bookbag.

"Sirius?" James called. "Sirius, pick up your damn mirror! It's an effing emergency!" James heard shuffling and a little ray of light showed. The light brightened and a din of voices grew into a muffled roar. James saw fleeting portraits until Sirius' grinning face appeared in the reflection.

"Hey, mate. Fucked her yet?" Sirius asked.

"Shut up, Padfoot. Put Kathleen on. I've got a question," James whispered.

"You're going to have to talk louder. I can't hear you." Sirius' voice was very loud. James heard Madam Pince hiss and he thought he saw Lily's redhead look suspiciously down his row. Nervous, James moved down a few rows.

"I'm in the library. I can't talk louder," James whispered to Sirius' ear that had replaced his face.

"Oh," Sirius' mouth appeared. James could almost smell his breath. _Note to self: brush Padfoot's teeth with buffer_. "So what's up?"

"Put Kathleen on," James repeated. The reflected turned to Sirius' torso; Sirius had probably propped the mirror on his plate. He tapped the girl beside him. It was Kathleen, whose expression turned from one of mirth to confusion with a hint of annoyance as Sirius explained what was going on. The mirror zoomed in on Kathleen's mouth, which thankfully was hygienic.

"You know, Prongs, if you two start dating, I won't be there to bail you out," her light, sarcastic tone had a hint of mockery in it.

"Ha-ha, just listen. I can't concentrate because I'm so hungry. Lily noticed and she said for me to get something to eat," James explained.

"Ah," Kathleen understood immediately. "How'd she say it? What words did she stress and what did she look like?"

James thought hard. "She said if it was _that_ important, for me to go eat. And if I was going to only complain, I should go."

"She's frustrated," Kathleen said automatically. "Probably tired and hungry herself."

"So what do I do?" James asked helplessly.

"Go sit back down. Try and look like you're working. I'll be there in a mo."

The mirror went blank. James had no idea what she was planning. He walked slowly back , feeling like every step was one step closer to hell. He sat down heavily. Lily looked up.

"You're back," she said, returning to her work. "Did you sneak some sweet or something?"

"No, I went to shelve the book," James said.

"That was an awful long time to shelve a book."

"I'm new to this library thing, remember?" James said. He looked at the page in front of him, pretending to read but really on wondering when Kathleen was getting there and if she was going to save him.

A few moments later, Kathleen came waltzing in. "Hey, you two. Aren't you going to eat?" she asked, sitting down.

Lily looked up, smiling tiredly at her friend. "I'm nearly done. Then we'll eat."

"Lils, you and I both know nearly done means you'll be here for another hour," Kathleen said gently.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily looked dangerously at her.

"It means you're stressing yourself out before you need to be. You don't have to have it all planned tomorrow. You've got a whole week. Besides, I know you're hungry. You always get irritable when you're hungry."

Lily sighed. "Fine. Give me five minutes to copy this last charm," she gave in.

"Do you one better. Grab the books that have your charms in them and we'll borrow them. I'll help you tonight write down what you need, okay?"

"All right," Lily piled four books and Kathleen carried them to the librarian.

"You two go on. I'll put the books in the room and meet you there," said Kathleen.

"Thanks again," Lily said, starting to walk out.

"Yeah, thanks again," James grinned.

"You are going to owe me big time once this is all over," Kathleen said in a singsong tone.

o.O

"Bloody hell, Prongs. These charms are hilarious!" Sirius was reading over Kathleen's shoulder as the latter was carefully scribing the finer points of the spells Lily had picked out.

"Lily got most of them," James said, looking over at the hard-at-work redhead. The mentioned glanced up and gave James a rare smile. "You see that?" he whispered to Kathleen and Sirius. "It's working. You are brilliant." James looked incredibly excited.

"Don't shit your pants just yet. You've still got another month of planning to deal with," Sirius spoke up. "And we all know how crabby your precious lily blossom gets."

Kathleen snorked. "You don't seriously call her that, do you?" James looked guilty.

"Not too often. It's mostly in his dreams," Sirius informed her.

"Sirius!" James' face was turning red as he worriedly looked at Lily.

"No worries, mate. Kathleen knows I'm joking," Sirius smiled down at Kathleen, who had returned to her writing. "You have _really_ good handwriting," he said in awe.

"Thanks. Lily's a stickler for neatness. Once, it was my turn to take notes in History and I scribbled. Lily 'bout had my head."

"I'd keep that in mind, Prongs. Your handwriting's nearly as bad as Peter's," Sirius said.

"You're so helpful," James said sarcastically. "Between the both of you, Lily will certainly be mine."

"You might want to work on some homework. She'd be impressed," Kathleen said.

"I don't see you working," James said. Kathleen pointed to the spellbooks. "Oh, yeah. You got special permission. Whatever." James dragged his bag over to the loveseat between the fire and Lily, Remus, and Grace's table. He pulled out his Transfiguration book and a piece of parchment. Stealing a final look at Lily, he went to work.

Sirius watched him sit. He settled onto the armrest of the chair Kathleen was sitting cross-legged on and kept reading. The two sat like that for a while until Kathleen looked up again.

"Are you going to read over my shoulder all night?" she asked.

"Perhaps not all night. I had some other plans for you and me tonight. Including whipped cream and top hats and you in a bathing suit with tails." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Forget it. No sexual favors for you, I'm busy. Go find one of your admirers. I'm sure they'd love to lick whipped cream off your stomach," Kathleen returned to her work.

"So can I sit here?" Sirius asked. Kathleen shrugged and he took that as affirmation.

o.O

"Perfect!" Lily exclaimed the next morning when Kathleen presented her with the extensive list of possible charms for the ball. "Thanks again, Kathleen. Does James know I'm sorry for snapping?"

Kathleen and Grace looked at Lily in shock. "You just called him James," Grace said with wide eyes.

"I did?" Lily asked. "Does he know?"

"Yeah," Kathleen said. She had a strange look on her face that Lily was unable to read.

"You know, me and James should probably go over these charms and pick some out to practice before seeing McGonnagall. Could you tell him?"

"Why don't you? You two are going to see each other quite a bit over the next month or so. You might as well start communicating now."

"Eurgh, don't remind me," Lily joked, but she wandered over to James, who was standing with Sirius, Remus, and Peter. "Hey, Ja-Potter?" she asked.

The named turned. He was already in Quidditch robes with his broom in hand, just like Sirius and Kathleen had been; James wanted the entire team suited up to watch trials and, as Sirius poetically said, intimidate the stupid little midgets. "Yeah?" he asked.

"Kathleen just gave me the list of charms we came up with. I figure we should practice a few tonight so we can be ready," she said. James looked at the paper.

"Could you make it Tuesday? Its trials today and tomorrow I've to start the newbies out," he asked. Lily was about to turn him down, telling him he had weeks to prepare for that stupid game with Slytherin. But James looked genuinely sorry to be canceling. Besides, Lily kind of wanted to make Sirius one of her guinea pigs.

"Alright, but see me at dinner. I'll give you a copy of the incantations for you to learn before then," lily said.

James nodded and called to Kathleen. "Oy, Jamison. Stop flirting and get your arse over here for practice!"

Kathleen glared at James. She turned back to the Hufflepuff boy she had been talking to and, soon later, came over to James.

"Thanks a lot, asshole. I was trying to land a date. Some of us don't have people whispering in their ear, telling them how to get guys," Kathleen snapped.

"No fraternizing with the enemy during Quidditch time," James reminded.

"He's not the enemy!"

"Yet," Sirius piped in.

"He's not even on their Quidditch team!"

"He's not your type then. Don't you only date Quidditch players?" James asked.

"Since when do you know what my type is?" snapped Kathleen.

"Since I've known you for nearly five years and have seen that the majority of you boyfriends have been Quidditch players."

"Well, maybe I'm looking for a change of pace!"

This argument between the boys and Kathleen carried on until they were out of the castle. The mood instantly changed.

"FYI, Lily called you James twice involuntarily," Kathleen smiled. "What have you done with the real Lily?"

"Call it my boyish charm," James said.

o.O

A/N: not as funny as my last chapters. Next chapter gets a little dramatic…oooo…(that was supposed to be a spooky, mysterious, and creepy 'oooo' by the way). The humor will try to show up again soon, but it's currently vacationing in Jamaica

And now for my reviewers!

**Zepplin Girl:** yeah, I updated fast because I had nothing else to do and my bloody cheap family doesn't go anywhere for vacation. Hope you didn't mind! ;) And I can think of a few people who would do the antlers thing (cough Claire! cough) hope you liked the update, although I can't promise I'll be as fast anymore. Crazy band director…

**Whiskygurl007:** ah ha, I have you worried about Lily and James, eh? You will have to keep reading to see how they find each other. And yes, Kathleen knows about Remus being a werewolf and the other Marauders being Animagi. At first, she was going to be an Animagi as well, but that wouldn't fit into what I'm thinking about for this story. If you read Truce, I put Kathleen's proposed Animagi form into Aliana, a spinoff of Kathleen's character.

Now follow their example and review! I always can make time for reading reviews.

Obscure Topic to Add in Reviews: how much going back to school sucks.


	5. Stalker

A/N: I'm back! after my first two HELLISH weeks of classes. Sorry it took so long to update. See my page for my long and crazy rant about how diggers suck.

Shout-outs at the end of the story.

Disclaimer: geez...I have Kathleen. I have Grace. I might not have the plot. I don't have any of the Marauders or LIly (although I really want Sirius)

o.O

Ch. 5: Stalker

Quidditch trials had gone incredibly well. Most of the team had been returning; only the Keeper and one Chaser had to be replaced. Most of the people had been absolute rubbish and the seventh years had fun teasing them quietly. Finally, James had handpicked a short third year with long blond hair and large blue eyes to be the new Chaser, named Max Simms. The keeper was a fourth year girl named Julia Wood, a mostly quiet girl with a Scottish accent. All in all, the team was very excited about the prospective year and everyone looked forward to winning the Cup.

James dismissed everyone for dinner and ran off himself to meet Lily. Sirius jogged after; he wasn't about to pass up a meal. Kathleen lagged behind, talking to the new recruits and giving them advice and pointers. Finally, she got in the castle and, saying goodbye to the rest of the team, wandered toward the Gryffindor Tower.

Walking along a deserted corridor, she started humming peacefully to herself. She was hoping to find Grace's secret stash of sweets and work on the last bit of her homework before classes. All in all, this year was shaping up to be a great final year at school: with any luck, Lily would loosen up and warm up toward James, who in turn would stop sighing about how perfectly perfect she was. Perhaps Remus and Grace would finally get together, since Kathleen almost knew for a fact that they secretly liked each other. Her classes were going well and the Quidditch team would probably take the Cup and Gryffindor may even take the House Cup. That is, if Sirius and James keep their house point deductions to a minimum.

Suddenly, Kathleen stopped walking. She had distinctly heard a scuffing sound, as if someone had been trailing her. She turned and, seeing no one, she started walking again. The scuffing sound was a little less pronounced, but it was still there. "Back off," Kathleen said to the nothingness around her. She started walking quicker, but the scuffer sped up as well. Kathleen turned the corner of the corridor and hid behind a statue, hoping to elude her invisible follower.

She stood there for what felt like ten minutes, keeping perfectly still and watching the corridor for any sign of movement. Once she was confidant that she was alone, she made to get out. But something held her back. Turning she saw her robe was caught on…thin air. The fabric looked like it was bunched in someone's fist. Kathleen took hold and tried to pull herself free, but the grip was iron.

_Her follower had been beside her the whole time. _

Something soft briefly brushed Kathleen's lips. It was so feather-light that Kathleen barely noticed that she was being kissed. "What the…?" Kathleen said before the lips interrupted her. Their touch was a bit more prominent this time but not lasting a second longer than the first. "Who are you?" Kathleen managed. The kisser didn't respond, just kissed her again, this time strongly. An arm snaked across her waist, pulling her forward so that Kathleen fell into an invisible chest.

It was a weird sensation, being kissed so passionately by an invisible force. At first, she had been worried that it was the Bloody Baron or one of the other ghosts. But that arm and that chest were definitely alive and breathing. Quite heavily, she noted, as if her attacker was as nervous as she.

Kathleen started kissing back involuntarily. The kisses were now getting more fervent. They were short, dominating, and forceful now; the starting, gentle kisses long forgotten. A guttural moan erupted from the invisible one in front of her. The sudden sound alerted her to what was going on. Kathleen pushed away, panting.

"Stop," she breathed. She looked, scared and ashamed, at the invisible chest that she had been leaning on. She looked up to where she imagined the eyes would be. "Please." A moment passed; Kathleen could feel the heartbeat grow slower as the grip on her waist disappeared. The scuffing was heard again, growing fainter as her attacker retreated.

But did he really attack her? Kathleen leaned against the wall behind her, still breathless. It had been a guy, judging by the flat, muscular chest her own had been pressed against. He had been a very good kisser and Kathleen had kissed him back. It had all been very innocent and he had stopped when she asked him. If he had wanted more, he could have easily taken advantage of her. They had been alone, everyone eating dinner. He was much bigger than she had been. He knew who she was, but he was disguised. But despite the obvious advantage he had, he didn't go farther.

Kathleen closed her eyes. He had had quite an affect on her. She was shaking violently, her heart beating as fast as it did before a Quidditch match. Her knees went weak and she slid down the wall. She buried her head in her arms and tried to catch her breath. Part of her never wanted that to happen again. But another was hoping she'd find those intoxicating lips again.

o.O

"Mate, we gotta talk," Sirius said to James. They were alone in their dorm room; Remus was downstairs with Grace and Peter was nowhere to be found. "You remember that curse Remus put on me? Where Snivellus haunted my dreams?"

James snickered. "All too well."

"Not a laughing matter mate," Sirius said seriously. (Pun intended)

"Why not? You're not having them anymore, are you?" James asked. As promised, he had given Sirius the counter curse after promising to back off around Lily.

"Kinda," Sirius said.

"What do you mean, kinda?" James said. Sirius squirmed; obviously there was something about his dreams Sirius wasn't comfortable sharing. "Spit it out mate!"

"Well…before all this, I'd been having dreams about…this girl," Sirius started in a quiet voice.

"Oh, really? Who? What kind of dreams?" James interrupted.

"Don't worry about it," Sirius said quickly. "But your curse…it only half worked."

"What do you mean?" James asked. Thinking about it, his face changed automatically. "Ah, mate…"

"Snivelly has taken…the girl's place in most of the dreams…" Sirius choked out.

"Ah, mate…"

"It's been getting worse. It used to be Snivelly just kissing me."

"Mate, that's sick!"

"But last night…"

"What's worse than kissing Snape?"

"…he was doing erotic things. Including whipped cream, a banana, and dirty dice."

James retched. "You're going to make me hurl!"

"You're not the one having the dreams!" Sirius cried. "I'm scared to fall asleep now. I'm worried that he might rape me!"

"You might want to talk to Kathleen or Grace about this. One of them might be able to give you a cure. Save you an embarrassing trip to the library," James said, wishing Sirius would shut up so the images in his head wouldn't get any worse than possible.

Sirius blanched. "I can't tell them! They're _girls_!" he said, a look of petrified shock at the thought of discussing his poufy dream escapades.

"Oh, right," James said, thinking hard. "Tell Remus then. He gave you the curse, maybe he can tell you how to stop these…dreams."

Sirius shuddered. "They're not dreams. They're nightmares," he groaned. He ran out of the room.

"REMUS!" he yelled. The mentioned looked up, along with Lily, Grace, and Kathleen.

"Yes, Sirius?" Remus asked coolly.

"Have you finally lost your mind. Black?" Lily asked. Sirius reddened.

"I'm starting to think so, yes," Sirius muttered to himself. "Remus, I need to talk to you," he said out loud.

"Then, talk," Remus said, putting his work aside.

"Alone, please," Sirius pleaded, turning even redder.

"I'm sure anything you need to tell me, you can say in front of the girls," Remus smiled; it was fun seeing the aloof Sirius Black squirm.

"Within reason. We don't need to hear about his member," Grace said. "Or his sexual encounters."

"Or lack thereof," Lily sniggered. Kathleen was silent, not looking at anyone.

"I––can't," Sirius stuttered. "Not here. Please, Remus. Just up in the room."

Remus sighed. "Can't it wait? Grace was in the middle of a story and I need to finish this essay."

"Please?" Sirius begged.

Remus sighed again. "Sorry, ladies. Grace, I'd love to hear the end of your story, but duty calls. I'll be right back," he excused himself. Sirius dragged him upstairs, whispering to Remus hurriedly. The girls watched him go.

"Wonder why Sirius was so intent on getting Remus upstairs?" Lily mulled.

"Orgy?" Grace asked. Lily looked at her in shock.

"You just said orgy!" Lily said, eyes wide. "I thought you were innocent!"

"Just think about it. James is up there. Sirius is up there. They're both known horn dogs. Now Remus is up there. Did you ever wonder if any of them were gay?" Grace explained.

"No!" Lily shouted. "That's disgusting!" She turned to Kathleen. "You don't think they're fairies, d'you?" she asked.

"Mmm?" Kathleen asked, looking at Lily.

"D'you think the boys are bum buddies?" Lily asked.

"And here I thought _you _were innocent," Grace said. Lily ignored her.

"Oh, er, no," Kathleen said. "I know for fact Remus and James aren't sausage jockeys." She returned to her work.

"And Sirius?" Lily prodded. Kathleen shrugged. "What's up, Kathleen? You've been quiet all day."

"I'm fine," she said dismissively. Lily didn't believe her.

o.O

Remus was laughing so hard, he was crying. James looked like he was debating going in on the mirth. Sirius was looking scared and worried.

"Remus, please help me! I promise I'll never eavesdrop again. Just take this spell off me!"

"I don't know about you, James, but I really want to know who this girl is that Sirius wants back in his dreams," Remus said. James nodded.

"Do you two just take pleasure in my torture?" Sirius whined. Remus and James nodded again. "Please. I'll do anything, Remus."

"Like telling us who this girl is that you fancy?" James asked.

"Except that. C'mon, mate" Sirius addressed Remus. "I'll help you land Grace."

"What?" Remus looked uncomfortable.

"Mate, you've been everything but subtle on the fact that you fancy that fine blonde girl," Sirius said.

"That's not who's been in your dreams, is it?" Remus asked, nervous.

"No," Sirius said. "And I'm not telling you lot who it is."

"Why? Is it that bad?" James asked.

"Potentially embarrassing, yes," Sirius stated.

"Fine, just don't tell Grace or any of her mates I like her," Remus sighed. He muttered the counter curse. "That should do it."

"Thanks, mate," Sirius sighed. "Now I don't have to fear my bed or History of Magic anymore."

o.O

A/N: hmmm...a bit of mystery, eh? Trying to bring the humor back here. I know it was short. The next few chappies will be shorter than usual until we get to the ball. yay! I'm currently writing the ball and its proving to be harder than expected. nevertheless, i trudge on.

Reviewers:

whiskeygurl007: yes, Lily does know James' first name...and called him by it. gasp is the world coming to an end? thanks for reviewing as often as you do!

Zepplin Girl: sorry to hear you lost the passion of fanfics. I went through a period like that and wrote a couple originals myself. I fluctuate btw fanfics and my own stories. that's completely spiffy that you write novels tho. and yes...i meant marching band and I have a small marching fanfic that I work on every so often. yes...I am obsessed.

Need. More. Reviews.

Please.

no obscure review topic. darn. guesses on the stalker are welcome. I personally think its deathly obvious but...first winner will get a chappie dedicated to them. sucky prize but it's all I have (see disclaimer)


	6. Voice Changes and an End to Accosting?

A/N: oh…my…gosh…i am a horrible person.

I seriously just realized I haven't been on in months. _slaps self_ stupid, stupid, stupid...

Blame band.

No seriously, marching season is (nearly) over, save a few playoffs, including one tomorrow (friday) against our rival, Bearden (seven in a row!!). of course this doesn't mean I suddenly won't know what to do with all the downtime, oh no! next week are concert band tryouts and it's practically expected of me to make first chair symphonic. _whines, goes to practice piece for billionth time_ so...no update for a while. the only reason this chappie's going up is I'm about five chapters ahead on this story. the rest...ah, not so good. But I'm trying! I've got ideas for 'Truce' and am suffering mild writer's block on this story and 'Cursed Love'

Well, enough rambling...

Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize.

I tried to bring my humor back. It's being stubborn.

o.O

Ch. 6: Vocal Changes and An End to Accosting?

Tuesday night, James invited Lily into his dorm. She had, of course, looked skeptical. But then James explained that it was only to practice the charms she had picked out. Still uneasy, she had asked Grace and Kathleen to come too.

"Thank God!" Sirius exhaled when he opened the door. "Someone other than me and Peter for James to practice on!"

"What do you mean?" Lily asked.

"My voice has been changed so often, I'm starting to miss puberty!" Sirius explained. Kathleen and Grace sniggered.

"What?" Grace said as Sirius looked at her in pain. "That was funny!"

James took that moment to walk in the room, drying his hair with a towel. He wore a pair of baggy faded jeans…and that was it; his well-toned bare chest was in clear view. Lily widened her eyes as Kathleen and Grace sniggered again. James blanched and ran over to his bed. Grabbing his red shirt, he began to button it quickly as Lily tried to recover.

"I-I wasn't expecting you so soon. I just got out of the shower," James stuttered.

"At least you thought to be dressed," Kathleen managed through laughs.

This time Lily blanched. The thought of James being sans pants…actually sounded kind of intriguing. _No, no. Lily, you hate him, remember. You are in his room for strictly business reasons._

_But still_…she thought

_No._

Lily shook herself mentally. "Get your shirt on, Potter. Let's get this over with. I don't want to be here more than I have to be."

"Yes you do," she heard Sirius mutter.

"For that comment, Black, you can go first. _Heliumnous_!"

"Nooooooo!" Sirius yelled, his voice getting progressively higher as the spell affected him. "Lily, why…is that my _voice_? Is that _my_ voice?" Sirius said, his hands at his throat. Kathleen and Grace collapsed on Sirius' and Remus' beds respectively, Remus looking in surprise at the sudden appearance of Grace at his feet.

"Oh…hi," Grace said, reddening in embarrassment.

"Hi," Remus smiled at her, making her blush further.

"Holy crap, Sirius!" Kathleen was rolling around on his bed, still laughing at him. "That is effing brilliant, Lils. Is there anyway to make that spell permanent?"

"Fuck off," Sirius squeaked.

"I can't take you serious with that voice," Kathleen giggled.

"Can't take me where?" Sirius asked, jumping on the bed. Kathleen tried to push him off, but he was too strong for her. He started tickling her mercilessly.

"Get off!" Kathleen screamed-laughed.

"It's my bed. I'll decide who gets off," Sirius squeaked.

"Oh, god. That voice!" Kathleen laughed. Sirius tickled harder. Kathleen screamed, making everyone in the vicinity cover their ears, except James, who fired a curse.

"_Muteo_!"

Kathleen's scream dissipated.

"Let's test it," James said. He knocked Sirius off Kathleen and dragged her to the doorway. Her mouth was moving as James pushed her out of the room. He repeated this many times so that Kathleen said:

"Than––ou s––much. Sir––uch a––ey! What ––doin––stard! I c –– bel –– ever ag –– elp –– et Lily! Arse!" Kathleen pushed her way back in. She ran over to Lily and pointed to her throat.

"You need a lozenge?" Lily asked sweetly. Kathleen shook her head feverishly and feverishly mimicked speaking. "Are you going to puke? Well, do it on James or Sirius, not me." Kathleen rolled her eyes and slapped her knee, then accidentally poked herself in the throat. She clutched it in pain. "So know you hurt your knee and you're choking?" Kathleen went for Lily's throat, but before she could strangle her, Lily said the counter curse.

"…effing curse off or––oh," she said. "Thanks."

"Well, we know that one works," Sirius squeaked. He groaned, hearing himself. "Can't you take this off me?"

"No," James laughed. "It's too funny."

"Damn you," Sirius sulked.

"We probably shouldn't use that one," Lily laughed.

"Except on Snape. Or Lucius," James said. "Aw, Lily, c'mon, let me do it!"

Lily looked pained. "Do it," Kathleen commanded. Lily looked at her and shrugged.

"I don't approve, but I guess if someone happened to have a squeaky voice at the dance, and I didn't know about it beforehand, I can't really do anything about it, can I?" her green eyes sparkled devilishly.

Lily and James practiced for the next two hours. Personal favorites were, of course Sirius' squeak, the deep, velvety voice Grace had acquired, the valley girl accent Remus got and Sirius had traded in for his squeak, and the sultry voice Kathleen had received.

The latter probably provided the most entertainment: on a dare, Kathleen came onto a sixth-year boy in the common room, who looked half-creeped out, half-aroused. This gave James the chance to practice the Modified Memory Charm he had learned to make people forget their costume until the night of the dance. Sirius came out later and interrogated him about Kathleen, still in his valley accent; the boy had no recollection of her, but found a lot of humor in his accent. The list was narrowed down and Lily deemed her and James ready to pitch the idea for the ball to McGonnagall.

o.O

"A masquerade?" McGonnagall was saying, disbelieving.

It was Thursday afternoon, just after Transfiguration, just before lunch. James and Lily had decided to hang around after to tell the professor about their idea.

"It'd be just like Muggle Halloween, but without the trick-or-treating," Lily explained. She had really liked Kathleen's comment on it.

"Yes, ma'am," James said. "And before you turn us down, hear me out. We've come up with a few harmless spells to put on the seventh years to completely disguise their identities so it's a true masquerade."

"Like what?" McGonnagall questioned, intrigued at the promise of a true masquerade.

Lily handed her their list of spells, incantations, and full description of the effects of each, as penned by Kathleen. "See, there's spells preventing students from telling others what their costumes are, spells to keep them from talking outside the dance, and spells to disguise their voices while inside the dance. We practiced the incantations and these are the ones that produced the best results."

McGonnagall removed her spectacles. "I am impressed, you two," she said, giving them each a rare smile. "I will pass this on to Professor Dumbledore for his approval, but if I were you, I would start planning the specifics."

"Thank you, ma'am," they said in unison.

"You may go."

Lily and James exited in silence. However, the second they were outside, Lily squealed.

"She loved it!" she cheered, jumping on James and hugging him ecstatically.

James was taken aback. He hesitantly hugged her back, smiling. Lily realized what was going on soon after and pushed him away. James let her. Lily was looking at the floor sheepishly and James cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his head nervously.

"Er…We should probably…" James started.

"Yeah…" Lily said in unison with him. She gave a small exhale, sounding like a repressed laugh and walked hurriedly toward the Great Hall. James watched her go and, the second she was out of sight, punched the air in success. He collected himself quickly and caught up with Lily, a broad smile flitting on his mouth.

o.O

"So, a tame bear, a one-eyed dentist, and limping pirate walk into a bar and –"

Lily burst into the Great Hall and slid into the seat next to Grace, making her stop mid-joke.

"How'd the meeting go?" she asked.

"McGonnagall loved it. She's passing the idea on to Dumbledore, but it's probably a yes!" Lily squealed. Grace and Kathleen squealed as well, causing all the boys to cover their ears.

"Girls," Sirius muttered as James sat next to him. James nodded, still smiling.

"And she told me to set a date and start really planning for it." The girls squealed again.

"Dear, God, do girls do anything beside scream?" Peter asked, spluttering potato on the table. Lily pulled a face.

"Swallow before speaking, Wormtail," Kathleen spoke up. Peter obliged and went back to his food. She turned back to Lily. "So, when's the big day?"

Lily shrugged. "What do you think, James?" Everyone at the table froze. "Potter," Lily corrected herself.

James shrugged. "End of October? It is supposed to be like Halloween, isn't it?"

"That's true," Lily said. "Week before Halloween, then. That way it doesn't interfere with the feast."

"Ah, the feast," Kathleen smiled. "Best one of the year."

Lily smiled. Kathleen loved Halloween; October 31st happened to be her birthday. She and Lily had gone trick-or-treating every year they knew each other until the time they started Hogwarts. Every year, they would scour all the surrounding neighborhoods and return to Kathleen's house for her parents' annual Halloween blowout/Kathleen's birthday party. Kathleen was known for her exhaustingly designed costumes; she practically started planning for the next year the day after Halloween. In past years, she was a crack-whore cheerleader, a black cat with a pet witch, a dead clown-in-training, and a homicidal mime.

"Why don't we start planning after lunch? We have a free period till one-forty," James suggested.

Lily nodded. "You going to help me with music, Grace?"

"Of course!" Grace loved music as much as Lily loved reading and Kathleen loved dance and Halloween. She played guitar, drums, flute, and saxophone, as well as sang her own original songs. She had been the one to supply the girls' dorm with the gramophone, which was charmed to play whenever someone was in the room.

"You gonna help too, Kathleen?" Lily asked.

"No, I need to use the library for that History paper due today," she said sheepishly.

"You still haven't done it?" Lily accused. "I thought you did it on Wednesday!"

"Emergency Quidditch," James said, also sheepish. Lily fired him a look. James shrugged. "Sorry."

"What is so great about chasing magicked balls on enchanted broomsticks?" Lily ejaculated. Sirius and James looked at her, disgusted.

"Don't…you dare…take the name of Quidditch in vain!" Sirius yelled. "Blasphemy! Sinner! You, my good woman, are a disgrace to all things good and proper!"

"You wanna know what's good and proper? Reading. Paying attention in class. Doing your work before the day it's due!" Lily snapped.

"I said I was sorry!" James and Kathleen said in unison. They looked at each other. "She wasn't talking to you," they said together. "No, she was talking to me…stop it!"

"Look, easy way to fix it," Remus butted in. "Kathleen, go finish your work. James, plan all your practices in advance. Lily, Kathleen is a good writer and James probably had good reason to plan that practice and it will all pay off when they win next week. Sirius, stop being stupid."

Everyone shut up. Kathleen finished her chicken, wiped her mouth, and stood up. "Right," she said, swallowing. "I'm going to go now. See you lot later." She picked up her bag and walked out.

o.O

Kathleen didn't really have to finish her paper; in reality, she had just written the last sentence when Sirius had come bursting in on her to drag her to the pitch. She wanted to find her invisible admirer.

It had been nearly a week since the initial meeting. It still haunted her. She would be sitting in class and suddenly get the sensation _he_ was watching her. She'd turn and see only people writing notes, practicing charms, or napping, depending on the class. Sometimes, she'd be laying in bed and start dreaming about that iron grip, that strong arm and chest, those hesitant, but possessing lips.

She was just around the corner from the library when she felt a whisper in her ear. She turned toward it, smiling through her eyelashes as strong arms snaked around her.

_He was back_.

The lips started attacking her. There was no hesitancy now. The kisses were fast, deep, passionate and she was kissing him right back. Invisible fingers were massaging her lower back, making her arch into a certain…pronounced piece of anatomy; there was now no doubt in Kathleen's mind that this was a guy who was apparently very happy to see her.

"Mmm," Kathleen moaned when he hit a certain spot of her back, making her buck involuntarily. The kisses stopped and, instead, his hot, heavy breathing hit her face like a blowing furnace. He gave a short exhale that may have been a disbelieving laugh. Kathleen gave a raise of her eyebrows, got on her tiptoes and started some kissing of her own.

The guy must have been taken aback by this act of confidence as he let Kathleen take the reins for a few minutes. Before too long, she felt a gentle nip at her lower lip. She gasped as his warm, moist tongue entered her mouth, immediately beginning to investigate its new territory. Their tongues had a pitched battle, fighting for dominance. Finally, Kathleen gave up and leaned against the wall, letting him take charge; it gave her a chance to think about what had happened to her twice in a week.

She still couldn't figure why a guy felt like he had to hide his identity to make out with her. At first, she had had a slight anxiety that it had been a very flat-chested girl that had been kissing her, but today had confirmed that her 'admirer' was definitely male. But why did he take such precaution before meeting her?

A scary though hit her: she might be kissing a Slytherin. That would explain the disillusioning; no one pureblood and proud, like most of that house, would risk kissing her when unveiled.

She turned her head, breaking the kiss sharply. She felt the boy's eyes on her, imagining they looked full of disappointment. "I can't," she held back sobs. There was silence. "I don't –– please don't find me anymore," she managed.

She felt a warm, invisible hand wipe a tear off her cheek. "I'm sorry," a deep, masculine voice whispered in her ear.

"Just go," she sobbed. Slowly, the presence lifted from her and Kathleen slid down the wall and started sobbing at full strength into her arms. The boy, still disillusioned, looked back and blew a kiss before disappearing around the corner.

o.O

A/N: gah...this piece is kicking my butt (yes, i'm talking about band again, bear with me)

But back to my story, I'm kinda frustrated with the lack of humor that has disappated since the first few chappies. Am I the only one? Do I need to remove this and revamp it to add some more humor? suggestions are needed deperately!

To My Two Reviewers:

whiskygurl007: just wanna say thanx for your continuous reviews. lovies to you and your questions and comments. and sorry about the innuendoes. i was in a really weird mood when i wrote that chappie. going back, i suppose i did go a little over the top...oops. very nice conclusion...i like your (long) thought process :), but you will have to wait for an answer!! yes i am mean...

ravenclawroyalty: sry i took so long...woah, three chappies?! and you loved them all?!? are they lacking in humor as much as i think? please let me know. i fear i've gotten too dramatic and angsty...i don't know, maybe i'm crazy. and i'm glad you love the idea of a masquerade!! phantom of the opera rox!! and so does the soundtrack _starts singing songs loud and off-key_ ...sorry...nice guess and nice hypothesis, all shall be revealed (haha...i find that strangely funny, don't know why) at the ball, which will be chapter 11 i think. i'm trying to write it right now.

look for updates on my other stories toward the middle and end of the month! and my birthday's on the 17th!! claps hands giddily a good audition and lots of reviews would be a great present (HINT HINT)


	7. Slave

A/N: yay another update! whoo! am currently killing time until I go back up to my school to check out my friend in her theater production class' production (that was redundant!) of Midsummer Night's Dream! She plays Quince and it should be AWESOME! apparently, one of the funniest guys in the school randomly kissed another guy in the middle of a scene last night (which just so happened to be opening night!) and no one broke character! I'm actually sorry i missed that! It would have been friggen hilarious to see. But apparently the director was pissed so...

but I'm getting off topic. You want to hear about my stories and why I haven't updated lately. Well, I made symphonic band and i've been crazy practicing my butt off. I had to sightread the scariest solo today! It was the in the middle of a page flip and I didn't know until I was counting measures and flipped the page! ACK!

off subject again...

Truce is coming along nicely (for once!). I got "high" off that sleepy chemical in turkey over Thanksgiving and wrote half of the next chappie! Then I came down...damn.

Cursed Love has hit another, hopefully minor, roadblock. But it too is also half written.

I promise updates around Christmas and the New Year. If not, let me be smited with bad things.

Disclaimer: it's so depressing. I own...what JKRowling's brillant mind has not yet thought up.

o.O

Ch. 7: Slave

Over the next few weeks, Lily and James spent many free period and weekends planning the Fall Ball. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that they were on friendlier terms than they had even been on in their lives. They were able to have long conversations without cursing, whether magical or verbal, and there had been more than one instance where Lily had accidentally called James by his first name. "It's like she finally learned your first name," Kathleen had said on the way down to the Slytherin match.

Kathleen was determined to win that match. She still dwelled on the thought of her attacker. Even though he had stopped every time she asked, she was afraid to walk down corridors alone. She couldn't shake the thought that she had kissed a Slytherin; in her mind, beating Slytherin would put a permanent stop to the assaults.

It had been a close match, in which she and Sirius had managed to hit most of the team at least once with Bludgers. They had this bet where whoever hit the most Slytherins would become the other's slave for two days. James was informed and he had no problem with the plan; after all, he hated Slytherin as much as the next person. But he had nearly called it off when Sirius purposely sent a Bludger into one of the Slytherin stands, trying to claim that it counted toward him. Slytherin was given three penalty shots, two of which Julia blocked. After the game (which Gryffindor, of course, won), James had named Kathleen winner and explained to Sirius, who was howling in indignity, that she, unlike him, didn't play dirty and deserved to win.

"That, and you're helping him land a date," Sirius muttered darkly. Kathleen noogied him and flounced off, happily. She planned to take Lily and Grace aside during the victory party so they could brainstorm as many evil things they could make him do.

o.O

"You missed a spot."

All three girls were in their dormitory on Sunday, the day after the game and the first day Sirius was Kathleen's slave. They were reclining on their respective beds and Sirius was cleaning their dormitory. Without magic.

"Did not," Sirius scowled. Grace dropped a Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Bean on the ground.

"Did too," she said, slapping palms with Lily.

"Aw, Padfoot, didn't I say 'no backtalking to me or my friends'? I think as punishment…you should eat the bean," Kathleen cackled.

Sirius rolled his eyes, popping the bean in his mouth. His face contorted. "Eurgh! Vomit flavor!" he retched as he spat it onto the floor.

"Lily, do you call that eating?" Kathleen asked.

"No," she giggled.

"Eat it properly, Siry," Kathleen prompted. He scowled at her and swallowed the bean quickly. "Now reclean the spot. We don't want Sirius spit on our lovely clean carpet." Grumbling, Sirius picked up the cleaner and began scrubbing hard. "No grumbling, please." Sirius shut up.

So far, he had to serve the girls breakfast in bed in a French maid outfit. Then Grace had given him a sombrero and cowboy boots to wear with the maid outfit and made him run around the castle screaming "I am the walrus!" He had run their little errands, such as pick up the food for the lunch the girls were currently having, get a book for Grace, return books to the library for Lily, clean the remains of last nights' party, and scrub the bathroom.

"I'm done. Is there anything else, oh magical mistress on high?" Sirius asked, using the title Kathleen had assigned herself.

"Not right now. I'll call you if I think of anything," Kathleen grinned. Sirius grabbed his broom that was sitting in the corner of the room, opened the door, and flew down to the common room. James was playing wizard chess with Peter and Remus was reading a book. Sirius collapsed on a chair.

"That woman has had me running around all day. Why couldn't you have named me winner, Prongs?" Sirius complained.

"Because it's too much fun seeing you come running at her beck and call," James said. "Check."

"And I still have another day of this," Sirius moaned. "Do you know what I would have made her do if she was my slave?"

"Do I want to know?" James asked. "Check."

"Probably not most of it. I'd make her clean our dorm, for one."

"That'd be a welcome change," Remus spoke up.

"I'd make her do my History essay and probably all my reading for the weekend. Hell, I'd just make her do my homework."

"That's so typical though. _Check_, Peter."

"I'd make her do a bunch of random shit, like hump a suit of armor or flirt with a Slytherin."

"You would really sink that low?" James looked up from his game.

Sirius shrugged. "It'd be funny. And it's not like I'd make her date the Slytherin. I mean, God, I do have some morals." He sighed. "Anyway, that's what I'd do. Instead, I'm stuck in their dorm, scrubbing everything in sight with no magic. I'm running their stupid errands and fulfilling their every twisted whim."

"Can't wait to see what she has planned for tomorrow. Checkmate."

"What?" the boy said, sweating. "How'd that happen?"

"I said 'check' a million times, Pete!"

"What the hell does 'check' mean?!"

o.O

"Carry my books, Padfoot."

"Yes, mistress of the universe, supreme Quidditch player."

"Open the door."

"Yes, mistress of the universe, supreme Quidditch player."

It was Monday morning and Kathleen had Sirius on a leash. Literally. She had dressed him in overalls, the cuffs hitting him mid-calf, a red, green, blue, and white shirt that was too small for him, and one of those propeller-topped beanies. So far, he had made her breakfast, called the strawberry jelly jam (of which there was none on her plate), done all the work in their first two classes, and predicted Professor Treawlney's death in his crystal ball. Now, he carried all of her books and a picnic lunch as he and the girls headed for the oak on the grounds.

This oak had been Lily, Grace, and Kathleen's favorite meeting place. It had large, sprawling branches, one of which jutted dramatically to the side and finally shot skyward to make a large sitting place. A short stone throw away was the Great Lake, where the giant squid was basking.

"Set the lunch on that branch," Kathleen commanded, pointing to the oddly shaped branch. Grace scrambled up to a branch just above Lily, who was sitting on the aforementioned branch, leaning against the trunk of the tree. "You can go…do whatever. Just stay where I can see you and you can hear me when I yell for you. Here," she handed him a small plate of chicken, mashed potatoes, and a cookie.

"Yes, mistress of the universe, superior Quidditch player," Sirius sulked off toward the lake, lunch in hand. Lily watched him go.

"Have I told you lately how absolutely brilliant this bet is?" she grinned up at Kathleen, who had taken the branch one up and in front of Lily's.

"Only a few hundred times. But I totally agree, it is effing amazing to see Sirius be my bitch," Kathleen laid carefully on the branch. "Pass me up some food?"

"Yes, mistress of the universe, superior Quidditch player," Lily giggled, handing Kathleen a plate of food and one to Grace. The girls ate and talked until the topic landed on the Fall Ball masquerade.

"We're almost done planning. Good thing too, the dance is less than a month away. The date's October 24th, by the way. Dumbledore's announcing it at dinner tonight. I think there's a Hogsmeade weekend this weekend so students can buy costumes. You two thought about it?" Lily asked.

"Of course," Kathleen said.

"A little," Grace admitted.

Lily had been thinking too. In fact, she had been racking her brain every time she and James sat down to work on plans. On any other occasion, she would have asked Kathleen for ideas, but that would be against the rules of the dance. She would just have to wait until Hogsmeade weekend and look around. Grace's voice suddenly interrupted her thoughts.

"Oy, Lily? What was that spell that made Sirius' voice all squeaky?"

o.O

"Black, have you finally succumbed yourself to being that Mudblood's bitch? Shame."

"The overalls suit your maturity level, Black."

"So does your voice."

The group was in Potions and the Slytherins were having a merry time tearing Sirius to bits about his clothing.

"I hope you're enjoying this," Sirius said. His voice was squeaky again.

Kathleen was laughing hysterically. "Oh, immensely," she said breathless. "Great idea, Grace."

Grace polished her nails on her robe. "Nothing to it," she grinned. She pinched Sirius' cheek. "He's such a cute little boy, after all. I just wanted the voice to match the clothes."

James, Remus, and Peter were laughing as well. "I think this was the best idea I've ever had, naming Kathleen winner of your bet. I could never have pulled this great a prank on you," James howled.

Kathleen mock-bowed. "Thank you, thank you very much," she imitated Elvis. Slughorn walked in that moment.

"Okay, ladies and gentlemen. Today's potion is Felix Felicies, the liquid luck potion. Be warned, I will be checking pockets for stolen potion," he winked. "Mr. Black, can you tell me one of the side effects of this potion?"

"Euphoria, sir," Sirius squeaked. The class cracked up. Slughorn looked at him worried.

"Sirius, m'boy, not done with puberty are you?" he winked again.

"No, sir. Kathleen, mistress of the universe, supreme Quidditch player, charmed my voice this way," he squeaked. The class laughed again. Slughorn looked at Kathleen.

"Is this true, Kathleen?" he asked.

"I won a bet with him. He's my slave for the day," Kathleen explained. "It was Lily's idea to do the voice."

"Well, then," Slughorn winked at Lily. "Just…try not to speak, Sirius, m'boy!"

"Gladly, sir," Sirius said, peppy. It's really hard not to sound peppy when your voice is higher than a falsetto Chihuahua.

"Sirius, cut up my daisy root," Kathleen reclined on her chair.

"Yes, mistress of the universe, supreme Quidditch player."

o.O

"So seventh years," Dumbledore was saying, "your Fall Ball is planned. It is a masquerade, one that for all intents and purposes will be a true masquerade. Meaning, you must not reveal your identity until the night of October 24th. There will be no way to counter this. You will be charmed the moment you order your mask so that you are unable to tell anyone what your disguise is. The houses, Entrance Hall, all corridors, and the grounds will be charmed so that no seventh years will be audible. The Great Hall is the only place your voice will appear and it will be disguised. All charms will commence two hours before the dance and will last until midnight on October 24th, when all the masks will be lifted and you can talk freely. Obviously, there will be no need to bring a date, as there will be no way to tell if you are actually with that person. A Hogsmeade weekend is planned for this weekend and seventh-years may leave town to find appropriate costumes. Any questions may be directed to me, any of the teachers, or your Head Boy and Girl."

Dumbledore sat down. Grace leaned over to Lily and James, who were grinning widely. "You pulled it off," she smiled.

"Good job," Remus commended them.

"Thanks Moony," James smiled. Frank leaned over.

"This is the weirdest ball I've ever heard of," he said to them.

"Don't hate, mate," Sirius warned, his voice back to normal. "They worked hard on this."

"They?" Frank asked, disbelieving. "You mean Lily actually let James _help_?"

Lily nodded. "You got a problem with that, Longbottom?"

"Back off, Frank," Alice, his girlfriend called him down. She whispered to Lily, "He's just upset that he won't be able to take me. He's worried that I'll hook up with some Slytherin scum."

Lily smiled. This dance would certainly start some inter-House mingling. She had suspected that was why McGonnagall and Dumbledore had been so excited about the idea; they had always been vying for the Houses to all be on good terms. Lily was excited because it would make the seventh years look beyond physical beauty and let them get to know each other on a deeper level.

James, however, was hoping and praying that Kathleen was right. He couldn't fathom what might happen if he mistook some other girl to be Lily. The whole plan to get Lily depended on the success of the unmasking, on whether or not he was standing opposite her when they revealed their faces.

o.O

A/N: haha that was sooooo much fun to write! slave...HA! (wipes tears of mirth from eyes)

Very Quick Shout Outs!

ravenclawroyalty: glad you were happy. hope I made you happy again (grins). glad i'm not too angst...i save that for cursed love (more girins)

ComplicatedDarknesS0103: glad to hear from you and welcome! your review sent me into rivlets of laughter (if that's a word. No idea, hunger is making brain ache) the admirer makes me giddy too (well you never said giddy, but its all in the subtext. haha king kong quote!) yes band can be a pain...are you in it! (gasps and giggles) tanks for da luck! it must have paid off (FIRST CHAIR BABY! WHOO!) anyways, thanks for reviewing.

whiskeygurl007: i'm writing as fast as I can! my poor fingers can only type so fast!! hehe, your bet of 20 smackeroos on Sirius is duly noted, but my pockets cannot meet your bet. I'm just a poor, undiscovered writer (sniffs, violin plays in background). but you shall know soon...(tease!)

o.O

Dinner awaits. Happy Thanksgiving, my fellow Americans! Hope you gorged yourselves so that we may live up to our obese standards! haha!


	8. Hogsmeade

A/N: a Happy New Year to all!!

as a gift (and I'm bored), I'm updating again. This is also a celebration, cuz I've been stuck on unlucky Ch. 13 (yes so far ahead) but my block has finally broken. Soo happy.

And by the way...Fall Ball is Ch. 11 now!! still trying to rework it...ball scenes are irritating...

usual disclaimer...don't want to write, it'll just depress me.

Ch. 8: Hogsmeade

On the morning of the first Saturday of October, Lily felt herself being poked.

"Liiiiilyyyy," a soft voice crooned. Lily groaned; even though she was the first to rise on weekdays, she did enjoy sleeping in on Saturday. _It's probably Grace. Or Kathleen._

A pillow whacked her upside the head._ Definitely Kathleen_, she concluded.

"What?" Lily rolled over. The brunette was now jumping on her bed.

"Get up, get up, get up!" she danced. "It's Hogsmeade! Costume shopping!"

"Yes, Lily. The Halloween madness has begun," Grace said, sitting on her bed brushing her hair.

Lily rolled over, groaning. She looked at her alarm clock. "Holy crap, Kathleen! It's eight! In the morning!"

"I know and I've had four cups of coffee and a stack of pumpkin pancakes and a cheese Danish!" Kathleen was now jumping from bed to bed.

"Why did you let her do that?" Lily accused Grace.

"She had woken me up at 7:30 and dragged me down to breakfast. I didn't know she'd already had her daily two cups so I didn't protest when she had another two cups and a cheese Danish," Grace whined. Kathleen was now flopping down on her bed over and over, giggling giddily every time.

"This would really hurt if I wasn't so hyper," Kathleen said as she landed face down for the thirteenth time. She fell backwards onto the floor. "Ow. _That_ one hurt," she giggled manically.

"If you don't calm down, I'm pulling out the straitjacket and keeping you from going to Hogsmeade," warned Lily.

"Nooooo!" Kathleen howled. She jumped on Lily's bed, crossed her legs, put her hands in her lap and smiled innocently. Lily looked at her warily and got up. Grace took Lily's place and began looking curiously at Kathleen. She made a face; Kathleen didn't flinch.

Lily shook her head and went into the bathroom. She examined her reflection as she washed her face. She still had no idea what she wanted her costume to be. She had stayed up late last night brainstorming, but all her ideas were things Kathleen had been in a past year or just really stupid. She felt like she has to have one of the best costumes because she designed the entire thing; if she showed up in something really lame, people would thing the party was lame. That was stupid, Lily scolded herself. They aren't going to know who she was. Still, maybe Kathleen's excitement for the end of October had rubbed off on her; for some reason, Lily had a feeling that something amazing was going to happen to at least her, if not Grace and Kathleen as well.

She finished up in the bathroom and walked back into her room, dressed and ready for Hogsmeade. Kathleen was still sitting on Lily's bed and Grace was still watching her.

"She hasn't moved an inch!" Grace yelled. "She's gone mad!"

"Mmph hmm," Kathleen said, widening her eyes.

"What was that?" Lily asked.

"Mmph hmm!"

"Talk!"

"Mm-mm."

"Just spit it out. I promise there will be no straitjacket," Lily said. Kathleen didn't; instead she keeled forward. Grace leapt back, hitting her head on Lily's headboard, trying to avoid Kathleen.

"She collapsed," Grace said. Her voice sounded worried and frightened. She began poking the comatose brunette. "I think she's dead!"

"No, this is what happens when she comes off this big of a sugar high," Lily sighed. She put her clothes and toiletries away. "She'll be fine in a second. Have you eaten?" Grace nodded. "Then keep an eye on her for me? I'll be back in a while."

Lily walked out of the room, as Grace sat back on the bed, examining Kathleen for vital signs and poking her again. The redhead laughed quietly and closed the door.

o.O

Meanwhile, James was fending off frantic questioners.

"No, I don't want to hear your costume ideas. That would be against the rules. No, even if you make your costume, you have to order a mask and you will get a Modified Memory Charm. No, I will not be your date. Honestly, what's the point? I won't know if I'm with you or not…what do you mean, 'that doesn't matter'?! The whole point of going to a dance with someone is to actually be with that person? What are you going to do, just rub it in people's faces that you went to a dance as James Potter's date? What do you mean, 'that's the basic idea'?!"

"Okay, clear off," Remus took charge as James was about to strangle the last girl who wanted a date. "There's nothing to see here."

"It's not that hard!" Sirius exclaimed. "Get a disguise, order a mask, go to the ball and dance with many anonymous partners! What is it about that that is so confusing?"

"They probably don't want to dance with many anonymous partners," Remus said sagely. "Let's face it: human beings by nature hate change of tradition. And this is not a traditional ball."

"Where's Lily when I need her?" James whined, putting his head on the table…in his eggs.

"Speaking of," Sirius said, waving exuberantly at the approaching girl.

"Ah, crap!" James said. "I've got egg in my hair!"

Lily chose the moment that James was frantically wiping his hair clean to walk up. "Can I sit with you guys?" she asked.

"Sure," Remus smiled.

Lily sat beside James, who was still riding himself of yolk, but less obvious. "You know you've got breakfast in your hair, right?" she asked him.

"Yes," he said dully. Sirius snorted unflatteringly. Lily looked at him oddly, but he quickly looked down at his plate, shoveling food in his face.

"So where are the girls?" Remus asked kindly.

"Grace is looking after Kathleen, who just passed out after coming off a major caffeine-sugar peak," Lily said calmly. "Pass the jam."

"Jelly," Sirius said automatically.

"Is she okay?" Remus interrupted before Lily could maul Padfoot.

"Which one?" she asked.

"Er…both?"

"Kathleen will be fine. She's done worse." Lily laughed. "There was this one time at my tenth birthday, where Kathleen got so hyper off sodas and whoppers that she passed out in the cake. We got so many pictures of her. Remind me to show you lot sometime. They're, as Kathleen would say, effing hilarious." Lily laughed again at the memory. "Anyway, this is Grace's first time seeing Kathleen on a major sugar valley, so she's a little freaked."

"Sounds freaky. I don't blame her," Sirius said.

"It sounds not too different when Sirius is drunk out of his mind," James commented. "We've gotten some very interesting information out of you on those occasions, mate."

"None of which will be repeated at this table!" Sirius yelled automatically.

"Like I want to hear about the horrors of a drunken Sirius," Lily scathed. Just then, Kathleen and Grace came walking in, the former supported by the latter. It was a rather humorous sight as Grace deposited Kathleen at Lily's side and slid in next to her. Kathleen promptly slumped onto the table, groaning.

"Hey Miiiiiikeeey," she called distantly

"What?" James asked.

"Mikey's got a gun," she murmured sleepily.

"Has she finally got 'round the loo?" Sirius said.

"I think the right phrase is 'around the bend', Padfoot," Remus corrected.

"I like…cheese," she murmured again. James and Sirius were sniggering behind their hands.

"She's been like this for the last minute. Is it normal?" Grace asked, looking worriedly at Lily. Lily waved it away.

"This is the best part, the sugar hangover," Lily said, leaning in to hear better.

"Watch out for the hammer…death to you by heavy shiny padlocks…everyone's got something to hide except for me and my monkey…good monkey…"

"Can we do this again?" Sirius asked. "I wanna be there for the whole thing next time!"

Kathleen snorked heavily, making them all jump. She raised her head, blinking in the bright light.

"Ug," she groaned. "Where am I…This isn't my dorm…LILY!!!" she yelled.

"Right here, hon, no need to yell," Lily sniggered. Sirius and James finally started laughing aloud.

"Who else is here? Where the hell _is_ here? Where'd the monkey go?" Kathleen asked.

"Have you gone mental?" Grace asked, serious.

"That's Grace," Kathleen pointed drunkenly. She slapped Grace sloppily on the head. "I…am not…retarded," she said, trying to look stern, but only looked dazed.

"You're in the Great Hall with Lily, Grace, James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter," Lily told her gently.

"Mmm…the Great Hall is…_great_," Kathleen smiled. "It has coffee."

"Don't let her have any," Lily warned. But it was unnecessary; Kathleen had passed out again. James and Sirius were now laughing hysterically. Even Remus and Grace were politely sniggering behind their hands.

"Is – is she okay?" Remus choked out.

"Yeah, once she wakes up this time, she'll be perfectly normal. Sad, that was the shortest hangover ever," Lily mourned. "Fifth time she's mentioned the monkey though."

"Shame," Sirius said.

o.O

And so, it was with much merriment, and slight sulking on Kathleen's part, that the seven seventh-years walked to Hogsmeade. Lily was filling Kathleen in on the finer points of her caffeine binge.

"Why didn't anyone stop me?" whined Kathleen.

"I told you," Grace said, rolling her eyes, "I was asleep when you went downstairs the first time and when you dragged me down, I let you have two more cups and a Danish, not knowing you had already consumed two cups of coffee and a stack of pancakes!"

"That, and it's incredibly funny to see you come off your high," Sirius pointed out.

"Much like you and alcohol," James commented.

"No mentioning, I told you!" Sirius yelled.

Once the group hit Hogsmeade, they spilt up to look for costumes in solitude. In response to the teacher's requests, the clothiers in town had each set up costume corners and a number of street vendors had appeared, advertising different disguises.

Lily stepped into her favorite store and began browsing. Almost automatically, a young woman looking like she had just graduated school herself, came up to her.

"Hi, you're from the school, aren't you?" Not waiting for a response, she continued. "I'm Regina. I graduated three years ago. We never had anything as cool as this for our Fall Ball. Who planned yours? Can I help you find a costume?" She said all this very fast.

"Er…please," Lily said. Regina smiled and pushed Lily into a changing room.

"You stay there. I'll be right back!" she called through the door.

o.O

Meanwhile, Kathleen was across the street, scouring the racks. She knew exactly what she wanted. The idea had been cooking in the back of her brain for years now. The other night, she had sketched the entire ensemble, mask, shoes, and all, and hidden it away. All that was left now was to find it.

She yanked it off the hanger. She ran into a dressing room and threw it on, excitedly. It fit perfectly. Getting back into her street clothes, she waltzed up to the counter and paid for it. All that was left was one last thing. Walking out, she noticed Grace looking with interest at one of the street vendors.

o.O

Like Kathleen, Grace had gone to Hogsmeade with a general idea of what she wanted to be. It was really Remus who had given her the idea. The thought of walking into a dance dressed as a goddess was appealing; finally being beautiful and smart at the same time. And if she ran into Remus, well so much the better.

_Now to figure out which goddess I should be_, she thought.

o.O

Back in Lily's dressing room, Regina had just thrown over a myriad of choices. She had already tried on and discarded the prostitute, baby doll, witch, and spider costumes. Currently she was standing in front of the mirror, dressed as a starving artist.

True, she did like the beret. But it was too simple and overpriced for a plain white shirt, black paint-splattered pants, and hat. She took it off and picked up another.

It was a wedge of cheese.

Lily cracked up before quickly discarding it. How anyone could ever think of going to a dance as cheese was beside her.

o.O

Kathleen walked back to the castle alone, carrying her purchase. She hurried up to the seventh floor, to the Room of Requirement. Concentrating on what she wanted, she paced three times in front of a stretch of wall until a door popped up. She opened it to revel a small room with a dirty stone floor and a matching stone fireplace with a blazing fire going. The hearth was ashy and unkempt. A pair of scissors was the only other object in the room.

Kathleen pulled out a gorgeous, floor-length white dress, sliver-white wings, and white lace-up heels. She laid the dress out on the dirty mantel and, taking a flaming stick, set the bottom of the dress on fire.

She watched it burn carefully until the dress had shortened to the correct length. She stamped out the fire, leaving dusty shoeprints on the once-sparkling dress. She did this a series of times until before changing into it; the skirt was now oblong and fraying. The hem ran from mid-calf on the right to mid-thigh on the right, blackened all around. Covering her hand in ash and dust, she wiped it on random parts of the dress until it looked worn and dead. She then picked up the scissors and jaggedly cut the left strap. She took the flaming stick again and briefly torched the edges.

She took up the wings and stuck the top right curve in the fire. She removed it and stomped it out so that a great burn mark marred it. She did the same to the lower left, then, after it cooled, magically attached them to her back. Lacing up the heels, leaving one half-undone, she walked over to a mirror that had just appeared on her right.

She smiled at her desolate look. _An angel who fell through the seven gates of hell. Perfect_, she thought.

o.O

Grace had finally decided. She left the street vendor and walked into a linen store. She walked up to the counter. "One plain white sheet, please," she asked the clerk.

She looked at Grace hard though her spectacles. "All right," she said before disappearing into the back room. Grace impatiently drummed her fingers on the counter. She noticed the two other women in the room were looking oddly at her

"What? Can't a teen buy bedding in peace?" she asked rudely. They looked away quickly as the clerk returned, sheet in tow.

"Three Sickles," she said harshly, putting the purchase in a bag. Grace paid and walked out. The clerk called her back. "May I ask what it is for?"

"No," Grace said simply. She walked into another clothing store and picked up a pair of gold gladiator sandals. A Galleon and two Knuts escaped her pocket as Grace walked out, happy her costume was finished.

o.O

"You nearly done?" Regina asked though the door.

Lily was standing in front of a mirror, dressed in a rich, Medieval-era dress. The full skirts were made of hunter green velvet with a wide split in the front middle revealing white silk embroidered with gold thread. The bodice was decorated with white lace and nipped in skin tight, accentuating Lily's narrow waist. The sleeves were long and tapered to a point on the back of her hand. It was V-necked and cut just above her bust, showing a little cleavage. It came with matching flats, which were a blessing since Lily was a klutz in heels, and a tiara, which was in Lily's hair.

She turned this way and that. It was easily the best costume she had come across. "Yeah, I think so," Lily called back. She slipped out of the dress and into her robes. She picked up the costume and carried it to the register, feeling a huge weight be lifted from her chest.

o.O

At dinner, McGonnagall came around to the Gryffindor table, handing out little pieces of paper to all the seventh-years.

"Wha'dis?" Sirius said, his mouth full of rice.

"Mask orders. Get this," Grace pointed at the bold, capitalized warning on the very top of the paper. 'Each seventh-year must order a mask using this paper. If not, you will not be able to go to the Ball. You have been warned.' Your idea, Lily?"

"Actually, that was Ja – Potter's addition," Lily said.

"Otherwise, people might sideswipe the rules and avoid the Modified Memory Curse. This way, the teachers can control the identity hiding better," James smiled.

"Pretty smart, Prongs. Evans has had a good influence on you this past month," Sirius slapped James' back, making him cough into his plate.

Lily looked at her order form. It only had three blanks: Name, House, and Color of Choice. The price of nine Knuts was printed at the bottom. Lily got out a quill and filled in 'Lily Evans, Gryffindor, white.' She extracted the money and left it on the table. From her spot she could read Kathleen and Grace's orders; white and gold respectively. She shut her eyes to keep from prying any farther. Instead, she scanned the other tables. Bent, scribbling seventh-years peppered the Great Hall. Lily grinned; even though the dance had aroused some protests and complaints, it seemed to be going off without a hitch. She couldn't wait for October 24th to roll around.

o.O

A/N: yes, ladies and gentlemen, the humor has come back and is here to stay!! kinda...I hope...

shout-outs!

**ravenclawroyalty:** spectacular AND amazing?! impossible! thanks all the same. and yes, poor Sirius and his too-small overalls (yay for random rhyming!) your update, as requested!!

**whiskeygurl007:** hehe, I have no idea, but writing at midnight does weird things to your mind. Just read Truce, written solely when sane people are sleeping...it was $20 on Sirius by the way.

**Mabudachi Trio:** new reviewer!! _(dances)_ yes, Sirius is finally a slave...sooo much fun to write! hope this was soon enough!!

**ComplicatedDarknesS0103:** ah, a fellow marching buddy! we don't do military...we do crazy weird twisted themed shows that come from the recesses of a middle-aged band director...OH the HORROR!! giggles stalker guy may or may not make another enterance...well, I know for sure, but you'll have to keep reading! ah, I'm so mean. wow...I didn't even think about the kinkiness of leashed Sirius...maybe I should rewrite that...no, that'd just be confusing. And I LOVE your idea for Snape. no worries, something very silly will happen including him and the ball...just wait...AGAIN I AM EVIL!!


	9. Hufflepuff

A/N: helloooo once again, another installment. and I think some of you will be VERY happy with who shows up here (_cough_complicateddarkness_cough_) gah, stupid cold.

I have an audition for my theater class tomorrow. we're doing dracula in present day and I'm so excited! I kinda really want Lucy just so I can flirt and die and be stabbed and all that fun stuff! But I'm worried cuz there's all these more talented underclassmen and if they beat me for the class, I will be depressed for quite a while. And cry...

but I'm happy again! whoo! no dark thoughts for me! thankeez to all my wonderous reviewers, new and old! I love you all and wish to give you bear huggles.

Disclaimer: urm...you know it all already.

o.O

Next weekend, Kathleen rose at eight forty-five. She stretched luxuriously before taking out her ponytail and brushing her hair. There were few things that made her voluntarily wake up early. Halloween was one and Quidditch was the other. It was the week before the Fall Ball, the Gryffindor v. Hufflepuff game.

She stood up and dressed in the scarlet robes that she had laid out the night before at the clucking of Lily.

"You're obsessed," Lily had commented as Kathleen magically ironed her game robes.

"You obsess over books and you don't see me saying anything," Kathleen had fired back.

Currently, Lily was snoring lightly in her bed, ignorant of the beaming sun. Grace's bed was empty and sloppily made. Kathleen grinned as she walked down to the Great Hall, checking her reflection on her way out. Just as she walked in, James and Sirius were getting up.

"You just woke up?" James asked angrily. He was always pissy on game days.

"Point?" Kathleen asked, sitting beside Grace and Remus. She buttered up a piece of toast as James leaned in beside her.

"My point," James seethed, "is that we need to go to the pitch. Like five minutes ago."

"Well, give me five more minutes to eat. You don't want your star Beater running on empty do you?" Kathleen asked, taking a bite of toast. James yanked her up by her collar. "Oh, you meant now? Okay, see you Grace, Remus." James dragged her out of the room, her toast in tow. "Can you give me a minute to get my broom? I left it in my dorm."

"You should have brought it to breakfast, Jamison," James scolded.

"If I went back, I could wake up Lily so she could watch," Kathleen grinned, playing James' weak point.

"Hurry," he said shortly. "Three minutes. I'm timing you." Kathleen took off running up the stairs.

Two minutes later, after a major detour on a moving staircase, she arrived in the Gryffindor common room, clutching the stitch in her side.

"I'm…fine," she panted as a few people looked at her worried. "Just…MOVE!" she dashed up the girls' staircase and burst in the room. She swiped up her broom and turned to look for Lily.

She was still asleep. With one fell sweep, Kathleen smacked her back with the brush end of the broom. Lily jumped up.

"What the HELL?!" she screamed.

"Get up! It's game time!" Kathleen called, already out the door.

Lily grumbled, snatching up her brush and pulled it furiously through her hair. She hated Quidditch. She hated heights. But since Kathleen was whining that Lily never came to a single one of her games, Lily had agreed to come today. She got up and started getting dressed.

o.O

"Four minutes and forty-two seconds," James clucked as Kathleen came to a sliding halt at his feet. "You need to run more."

Kathleen was too out of breath to do anything but pummel James with her broom. Over and over.

"Ack! What the fuck, Jamison?!" he yelled. Sirius grabbed Kathleen and held her at bay, trying to avoid her still swinging broom and biting teeth.

"Let me at him! Just let me at the ungrateful…sniveling…bastard! It's not my fault the staircases decided to move the second I stepped on them!"

"Here, have your toast," Sirius stuffed the crispy bread in Kathleen's mouth, muffling the string of curses that were leaking out. "Let's go." He helped James stand and forcefully pushed the duo out and down toward the pitch. It wasn't until he had reached the team area that he let Kathleen and James go…on separate sides of the room. The rest of the team had already assembled and were looking strangely at their Captain.

"Right…" he panted. "Sorry I'm late."

"Great example you're setting for the rest of us," Wilber, another Chaser, said.

"Shut it. Now, I'm supposed to be giving you a pep talk, but truth is, you don't need it. You're all good players and, if you concentrate and don't get too cocky, we'll win. All right, grab your brooms. Beaters grab your bats and…try not to kill each other. Or the team. Or anyone for that matter. Let's go." James walked out. Sirius was about to follow when something caught his sleeve.

He turned his head to see a worried Kathleen. "I can't find my bat!" she whispered.

"Didn't you leave it down here after last game?" he asked.

"Yes, but now it's gone!"

"What do you want me to do?"

" I dunno…stall. I'll be out in a minute." She fell to rummaging behind chairs and benches as Sirius walked up to James.

"Hey, mate," he said. "You ever hear the one about the tame bear, the one-eyed dentist, and the limping pirate?"

o.O

Kathleen huffed in frustration. She had looked everywhere: the shelves, behind the seats, even the showers, but her bat was nowhere to be found. _Oh, James is going to kill me,_ she thought wringing her hands. _I wonder if there is some way to sneak up to the stands to ask Grace or Lily_.

She turned, still debating, when she hit something solid. Invisible…and solid.

"You," Kathleen breathed. He was silent. "I thought I asked you to go." More silence, then the familiar scuffing grew fainter. "No…wait," she said. The scuffing stopped; Kathleen imagined he was looking back at her from the doorway. "Can you help me? I can't find my bat and the game is about to start and James is going to kill me and probably Sirius if I don't get out there soon." She wished he'd talk. Then maybe she wouldn't feel so much like she was talking to thin air.

She suddenly felt a squeeze on her upper arm, as if reassuring her he was there for her. Kathleen sighed, and began looking around nervously, thinking of some other place her bat could possibly be.

"Hey," a voice suddenly said. Kathleen looked and saw her Beater's bat floating in midair. Kathleen squealed and ran over.

"Omigosh, thank you so much!" she ran into his chest, hugging him tightly. He hesitated, and then hugged her back. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't shone up." Tears were leaking out of Kathleen's eyes now. The invisible boy held her at arm's length and wiped them away.

"Get out there. We don't want James killing off the best Beater Gryffindor has," he said. Kathleen grinned and, on a split decision, found his cheek and kissed it.

He caught her jaw and pushed her mouth to meet his. It was just like last time; they progressed quickly to short, fervent smooches full of need, lust, and passion. Kathleen felt a moan rumbling in her throat but before it tumbled onto her lips, he broke away.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "I-I just…"

Kathleen put a finger to his lips; by now, she knew exactly where they were. "Don't be." She felt him kiss her fingers, then take them in his large, warm hand. "Listen, I don't know if you're a seventh-year or not and I know I'm not supposed to have a date, but…"

"I'll look for you," he finished. "Now go." He pecked her cheek and pushed her out of the room, bat and broom in hand. James saw her almost immediately. He came rushing over and took her by the crook of the elbow.

"Where have you been?" he demanded more than questioned. He was dragging her over to the team. "I almost had to forfeit!"

"Bathroom. Sorry," she winked at Sirius, who was giving her a gleeful thumbs-up. "What say we effing win this thing?!"

o.O

They did.

I mean, what else did you expect, it's only Hufflepuff.

Right after the game, an estatic Grace and a still shaky Lily tackled Kathleen.

"I am never coming to another one of these damn things!" she quaked. "Making humans sit side by side with birds is against their nature!"

Kathleen left with them, ignoring James' yells for her to 'get back here right now! We need to discuss your tardiness and future on this team…or lack thereof!'

"Aren't you worried about getting kicked off?" Grace asked, looking back.

"Nope, I've got more than one in," Kathleen winked and looked at Lily. Grace stifled a giggle.

"Hey!" Sirius came running up beside them. "James wants to talk to you."

"Tell him it's a female emergency," Kathleen said. Sirius' face contorted momentarily, but cleared.

"Party in an hour or so. Attendance is mandatory for all Gryffindors. Don't even try to shut us down, Evans," he waved as he trotted back to James.

"Female emergency?" Lily asked. "What kind of lame excuse is that?"

"I need to hang with you two. You're females and it's an emergency. Trust me, James will let me off the hook."

"Is this one of your 'ins'?" Lily asked.

Kathleen and Grace held back laughs. "Kinda," Grace piped, before cracking up. She knew as well as Kathleen that the one of the only reasons that James has put up with Kathleen's lenient attendance to Quidditch things is that she was Lily's best friend.

o.O

Lily was sitting on the couch, watching the rowdy Gryffindors run around. _What is it about a stupid Quidditch win that makes people act like toddlers on crack? _she thought. Five minutes earlier, Sirius had dared Peter to put on a cape and 'fly' off the staircase. He was left in the corner, slowing regaining consciousness, thanks to the butterbeer beside him that Lily had begun to suspect was spiked.

Kathleen sat hard beside her, her hair mussed and post-victory clothes wrinkled; James liked for the team to wear scarlet or gold after any game they won. If they lost, which rarely happened, they wore black. Currently Kathleen was wearing a red sleeveless top, white capris, and a gold wrap on her hips.

"Hey, chickabiddie," Kathleen said brightly. "God, I love parties. Aren't you going to dance or are you gong to sit there all night?"

"I'm perfectly content with sitting currently," Lily sighed.

"Grace and Remus sure look cute, don't they?" Lily looked at the blonde sitting in a corner with the boy, talking animatedly.

"They do," she said quietly. Kathleen looked at her, then dragged her up.

"C'mon, we're finding you a guy. Plenty of fish here to pick from." Lily protested heavily. Luckily, a sixth-year guy came up to Kathleen and spun her around.

"You, me, dance floor?" he asked, twirling her in.

"Let's go," Kathleen twirled back out quickly, her head snapping around like a ballerina's. Lily watched her go and dance with the boy. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sirius glance over from the girl that was currently dancing with him. _Note to self: set up Sirius and Kathleen so I can be in peace from their flirting. Oh…and find ME a guy._

_That isn't going to happen if you just sit here,_ a voice sounding a lot like Kathleen's said in the back of her mind. Lily made up her mind: she stood, then realized she had no one to dance with. Like the misfit loser she felt like, she wandered over to the enormous spread the Marauders had set out.

_The drinks are probably spiked. Only the packaged stuff is trustworthy…unless they resealed the wrapper. Would they go to so much trouble?_ Lily debated, looking hard at the choices. She didn't notice someone come up behind her.

"Do you eat with your eyes or something?" he said. Lily jumped and turned. It was a seventh-year boy who she never really got to know. He didn't room with James and the other Marauders, she knew that for sure. He didn't play Quidditch, obviously, or Lily would actually know his name.

"No, I'm trying to figure out what's safe to eat. The Marauders set it up," Lily said, looking back at the table.

"Ah," he said wisely. "Then trust nothing. Thanks for the tip." Lily turned again. The boy had a light, natural tan, light hazel eyes, and sandy brown curls. He was roughly Lily's height, perhaps a few centimeters taller, and wore glasses. He was dressed in a white button-down, faded jeans, and flip-flops. He was quite a looker, if you dig the preppy-nerd look.

"I'm Lily Evans," Lily put out a hand. He took it and shook it strongly.

"Mitchell Rudy. I just moved in last year. Aren't you mates with that chick Beater?"

"Kathleen? Yeah. The one dancing up on that guy in the green shirt," Lily said, looking at friend.

"Aw, no way. That's my bud, Tyler!" Mitchell exclaimed. "At least we know our friends will be friends."

"At least until the song ends," Lily laughed. She looked at the table. "God, I'm thirsty."

"Then have some butterbeer."

"Remember? Marauders? It's probably spiked," Lily sighed.

"No problem," Mitchell said, pouring a drink. He tapped the rim and handed it to Lily. "There, guaranteed liquor-free."

Lily frowned. She took the drink but didn't drink. "How can I trust you?"

"A taste won't kill you. If there's still something in it, them I give you full permission to make me a eunuch." Lily obliged; the Head Girl deemed the drink drinkable. Suddenly the music took on a slower tempo. Mitchell and Lily looked at each other. Without a word, Mitchell offered a hand. Lily took it and was led to the floor.

o.O

"May I cut in?"

Kathleen and Tyler looked at James, who was looking livid. "No," Tyler said and returned to dancing. James took him by the collar.

"Here's the deal. You let me talk with Jamison or I'll castrate you," he growled. Tyler scampered off quickly. James grabbed Kathleen's elbow and dragged her off to a quiet corner. "Have you seen Lily?" he asked, his eyebrows furrowed in frustration.

"You look constipated," Kathleen said.

"Not important. Last I saw Lily, she was sitting on the couch. I put a slow song on next so I could ask her, but now she's gone!"

"Don't get your knickers in a twist, Potter," Kathleen wisely said. "She might have gone to the loo, or to find some food and drink that isn't contaminated with alcohol. Or…" she trailed.

"Or?"

"Or she could be standing by the snack table talking to Mitchell Rudy."

James turned so fast, his neck cracked. Sure enough, Lily was laughing with the sandy-haired boy that James only faintly knew. He turned back to Kathleen, who was smiling pleasantly at the scene. "You find this amusing?"

"Just that Lily is finally flirting. She finally took my advice and went boy hunting," Kathleen said. She wiped away a fake tear. "They grow up so fast."

"You told her to go boy hunting?" James seethed.

"Not now. If you want to dance with her, you better go now. Mitch and Lils are looking pretty buddy buddy there."

James shut his mouth and strode over to Lily just as the song changed. Wordlessly, he stopped in his tracks as Mitchell led a blushing Lily toward him. He watched them begin to dance…to the song he had picked out for her. James turned to find Kathleen, maybe dance and talk some more, but Tyler had already claimed her again. Hanging his head, he walked over to the couch and sat, pouting slightly.

o.O

A/N: yes its a very abrupt ending. I'll probably alter it slightly later.

next chapter will be up VERY soon. It is very short and just a quick dose of humor before the ball! squee! I'm so nervous about how you all are going to react...twists galore! and no the story will NOT end next chappie!! hehe (_laughs nervously, looks around_)

REVIEW MY LOVERLIES!!!! (_scampers off_)


	10. A Short! Chapter Devoted to Poking

A/N: soooo sorry you all that this is sooooo long in coming! Band has taken over my life. We have contest on monday and i have THREE icky solos and am sweating bullets. But you don't want to hear my griping, you want to read!

This was only a PAGE on word. Yes, ridiculously shorter than anything i've ever written. But humor is back in full force here! This scene came to me recently and it had to happen pre-Ball. And considering the ball is NEXT CHAPTER (listens to excited screaming, smiles), i figured we could all use a humor break in all the drama.

I warn you, the ball is NOT the end of the story...oh, no, only the climax! Bwahahahaha! And the story will become more dramatic after next chapter, if that's possible, and hopefully my writing style will improve. I began writing this LONG before i posted it and my style has matured (i hope). So beware style changes! And i'll be revamping the old chappies eventually as well

Disclaimer: as usual, I own all...o wait (wakes up from daydream) damn...

Ch. 10: A (Short!) Chapter Devoted to Poking

"So I was thinking we start with a few songs that are just fun to listen to before moving into the actual dancing songs," Lily said. She and James were sitting at a table during Tuesday free period. James was still bitter over the party; Mitchell had taken any opportunity to speak with Lily he could. It wasn't very often, as they didn't have many classes together, but it was often enough for James to be in a really foul mood.

"Whatever," James sulked. He was twirling his wand absently, making his roughly drawn Mitchell tap dance goofily. With a muttered curse, a grenade showed on the page and landed beside the doodle boy. A look of momentary shock crossed Doodle Mitchell's face before he disappeared in a poof of smoke. James grinned maliciously. Suddenly, the wand flew out of his hand. "Hey!" he yelled. He looked up to see a pissed Lily.

"Do you realize the dance is this weekend?!" she fumed. "Now, either you straighten up or…well, I don't quite know what I'll do, but it'll be bad!" she finished lamely. "GRACE!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAH!" the aforementioned screamed, jumping violently and falling out of her chair, her books and papers going flying. James snickered softly; luckily, Lily didn't notice.

"Music time!" Lily called.

"Music time! Yayyy!" Grace yelled, abandoning her paper straightening and scampered over. "Scooch James.

"Uh, I'm partially in charge here. Find your own chair," James said indignantly. Lily glared at him.

"You aren't helping at all, so this is a mutiny. All in favor of James not having any more say in this dance?" Lily raised her hand, as did Grace. "You're outnumbered. Move." James grumbled and sat beside Sirius, who was napping. James pouted for a minute, glanced at Sirius, then humphed. He recrossed his arms and sighed yet again. Sirius still hadn't noticed him, so James poked him.

"Oy!" Sirius snorked. It had been a very hard poke. "What was that for?"

"Your best mate's pissed. Show some remorse," James snapped.

"Aw," Sirius pulled a puppy-dog face for five seconds before settling back to fall back asleep.

James poked him again.

"What?" Sirius rolled his eyes.

"She mutinized me!" James half yelled, half whispered.

"Mutinized?" Sirius asked sleepily.

"Y'know, performed a mutiny? What would you call that?"

"Ask Moony." Sirius yawned largely.

James poked him again.

"Why won't Kathleen help me anymore? She said everything will be fine once me and Lily got into the dance planning."

"Did you poke her to death every time she tried to fall asleep?" Sirius grumbled. "'Cuz that's really annoying."

"Is it?" James asked. Sirius nodded and closed his eyes.

James poked him again.

Sirius shoved him off the couch.

"What the fuck?!" James yelled.

"STOP FUCKING POKING ME AND LET ME SLEEP!" Sirius roared.

"HEY!" Kathleen yelled from a chair near the window. "Some of us are trying to do homework. So do us all a favor and EFFING SHUT YOUR PIEHOLES!" James sobered up and went up to his room to pout in peace. Sirius settle back down and promptly fell asleep. Lily and Grace were still working, undaunted by the loud cursing around them.

o.O

A/N: tada...told ya it was short.

And it has come to my attention that replying to reviewers here is against rules. ergo...THANKIES TO ALL! AND KEEP REVIEWING!!


	11. Fall Ball, Finally

A/N: wow, i let this go. SORRY! see my prof for full apology but it basically comes down to the events surrounding senior year, including but not limited to struggling with college admissions, the excitement of being accepted to dream college (emerson '12 baby!!), attempting to forget acception to dream college to get A's in challenging second semester courses, and euphoria at getting all A's in my challenging second semester courses (94 in AP English Lit and 95 in AP Euro History!!).

but enough of my excuses. you don't want to here my excuses. you want to see...THE FALL BALL!! That's right, after long long wait, Halloween has come with a side of drama. I want to warn now: this is by no means the final chapter. You'll see why as you read. Let's just say, things have not resolved. And we are only about 1/3 of the way through this very fun journey. So please, no flames about my faults that include, but are not limited to my poor writing style, the abundance of confusion about who is who, and that things...don't succeed.

that said, this is not my fav. chappie. that would be the next one. I"m really excited to hear what you think about it. but first...

Ch. 11: Fall Ball, Finally

(oh, and i own nothing. these disclaimers get more and more redundant the more i right)

Finally, Saturday, October 24th dawned crisp and slightly overcast, giving the entire grounds an eerie aura, perfect for the ball. The seventh years spent most of the day outside doing what ever they felt like. For Lily, that was sitting in her tree reading. For James, it was watching Lily read. For Grace, it was reading with Remus. For Sirius, it was watching everyone. For Kathleen, it was talking numerous people then sitting with everyone and napping. An hour before the dance, Lily disappeared to start on her costume.

Once she had returned from Hogsmeade, she had hidden her costume in her Head Girl bathroom. She drew a quick bath and washed and conditioned her hair and scrubbed her body. She swam around a bit, then hoisted herself out and wrapped herself in a towel. She walked over to the mirror and looked at her hair.

She decided to leave it alone after giving it a zigzag part. She finished drying off and pulled the dress over her head. She slipped into the flats and gently set the tiara on her hair, muttering a curse so it would stay on. Scrunching her curls, Lily let a section sit over her shoulder. She put on her mask and applied a little lip gloss before turning around one more, then exiting.

o.O

Meanwhile, Kathleen stepped out of the shower in the girls' dormitory. She scrunched her hair and put it up in a sloppy bun. She curled a few pieces around her face and let them hang. She dressed in her robes and ran down the stairs. She met up with Sirius and James, who were heading up to their room.

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked. "Dance is in an half an hour."

"You think I don't know that?" Kathleen asked, going out of the Gryffindor Tower.

o.O

Up in her dorm, Grace's hair was in curlers and she was dressing in a white camisole and pants. Standing in front of a mirror, she draped her sheet over her body. She tried this several times before she was finally satisfied and pinned it. She had put on a sunless tanner a while ago, so the white of her sheet and the gold eye shadow and white shimmer powder she had put on gave her a mystical glow. She laced up her gold gladiators and began undoing her curlers, letting them cascade onto her shoulders.

o.O

Kathleen had gotten into her white dress and wings rather quickly and laced up her heels. She conjured up a floating mirror and began applying a smoky eye shadow and brown-black mascara. She put on a little red lipstick and put on her white mask.

"Perfect," she said to herself. Of course, her eyes weren't visible, but it would be nice to still be in makeup at midnight.

o.O

The way to the Great Hall was lit with floating candles and a soft Queen song floated down the hall. Masked students walked beside Lily, some trying to talk but failing; the Selective Silence charms had gone into effect fifteen minutes before the dance began.

In the Entrance Hall, there were lines to get in. Lily got in the shortest one and took the time to look around and see the different costumes. She saw a mermaid trying to talk to a bear, the grim reaper, a disemboweled war hero and…Lily started to laugh. Someone had bought the cheese costume she had seen. He was alone and people around him were pointing and laughing openly but silently. Lily sniggered as she faced forward. Professor Flitwick dressed as a leprechaun greeted her.

"Princess, eh?" he squeaked. "Just the voice for you, darling." He waved his wand and pushed her in.

"Thank you, Professor," Lily curtsied, her voice a very proper English accent. She turned and admired the room. Medium-sized round tables were scattered in the vicinity, each topped with white linen and Mardi Gras-like masks nestled in floral bouquets. The idea was to start with dinner and let the seventh-years talk to each other before the dancing started. She spotted a table near the stage; a phantom, Sherlock, a goddess, the grim reaper she had seen earlier, and a pirate inhabited it.

"Mind if I…?" Lily asked. The pirate turned first and grinned. Bowing, he pulled out a chair for her.

"It would be our honor, Your Majesty," he said. Lily blushed and took the chair. The pirate took the one beside her. "Do you often come to these things?" he joked.

"I would think you couldn't, being busy pillaging," Lily joked back.

"I'm actually in the market for a new crew as we speak," he grinned. "That and a classy broad like yourself, ma'am."

"Having fun hitting on the princess, there, Captain?" the grim reaper broke in.

"Got to stay out of trouble some how," the pirate responded.

Lily laughed and looked around at the other occupants of the table. The goddess and Sherlock were absorbed in conversation, oblivious to the rest of the room. The phantom was looking around, as if searching for someone. Suddenly, he smiled and stood.

"If you lot will excuse me," he said in a deep, rich voice, "there's someone I need to speak with."

o.O

Kathleen walked in, quite happy with the soft voice McGonnagall had given her. She looked around and smiled. _Lily and James did an amazing job_, she thought. She crossed her arms. _I wonder if he'll find me_. Suddenly, she felt herself be twirled around. She was greeted by a tall figure in all black, save a black and red cape on his shoulders and his white mask, white sharply contrasted with his tan face. He wrapped his arms around her and whispered in her ear, "Do you believe in angels?"

Kathleen grinned. "Hello, stranger," she whispered. "Did you sit up in your opera house thinking up that corny pick-up line, Mr. Phantom of the Opera?"

"Touché, Kathleen. At least, you have the insight to figure out my costume. I've had everything from prince to vampire to emo-man, the depressed superhero."

"Saving the world one razor blade at a time?" Kathleen laughed. "How'd you know it's me?"

"Actually, that was a bluff," he smiled. "Although the necklace tipped me off."

Kathleen rubbed the diamond necklace around her neck. She wore it quite often. "Well, Lily won't be too happy to hear I screwed over her total masquerade idea," she muttered.

"Don't feel too special. I heard a number of people coming up with ways to ruin it. People are meeting in special places or wearing certain pieces of jewelry to distinguish each other. Besides, I won't tell her if you don't."

Kathleen grinned. "Well, now you know who I am. Why can't I know who you are?"

"I think you do know," he whispered huskily. He kissed her soundly on the lips. Kathleen smiled into the kiss before he broke away.

"But I don't know _who_ you are," Kathleen pouted. The phantom kissed the tip of her nose.

"Wait until midnight," he said coyly.

"I can't wait that long," she moaned.

"Well let's find a quiet table and we can talk. We haven't done much of that in the times we've met." He led her to a secluded two-person table along the wall and pulled the chair out for her. Kathleen waited until he was settled before starting.

"Are you a Slytherin?" she burst. He laughed.

"That was quick. No, can't say that I am. Disappointed?"

"Relieved," she sighed. "So what house are you?"

"You'll find out later."

Kathleen sighed. "So do I know you?"

"You've carried on numerous conversations with me if that's what you're asking," he smiled.

"You're being vague."

"I told you, I'm not revealing who I am until midnight. Makes me be vague," he shrugged. Kathleen huffed and sat back, crossing her arms. "You're cute when you're exasperated." Kathleen pursed her lips, suppressing an amused smile. _Tonight would be interesting. _

o.O

"So what prompted your costuming?"

Grace was talking to a guy dressed as Sherlock Holmes, one of her favorite book characters. She had been doing so since they met at the doorway. He had been slightly unsure of himself, but in the last half hour, he had come out of his shell and proved to be able to hold an intellectual and joking conversation.

"A guy friend I admire once told me that women could be beautiful and brilliant like the Greek goddesses. I figured I would explore that theory."

Sherlock smiled. "That's a very smart theory."

"I think he's been avoiding me, though."

"What?"

"I dunno. It's just a feeling I get. Every time I go to say hi to him, he seems to hide behind his mates and just seems…nervous or anxious," Grace looked at the floor. Sherlock, however, looked thoughtful.

"Maybe when he said you were an example of someone who was pretty and brilliant, he was afraid you would think he was hitting on you. So he got nervous of how you would act around him and is, as you think, avoiding you. Besides, I know how you feel."

"Oh?" Grace asked, looking up. "What's wrong?"

"It's this girl I'm friends with. I've…kinda had a crush on her for a while, but I can't bring myself to do anything about it. See, I've got this secret that I haven't told anyone but my best mates. I'm afraid if I did ask her out, when I told her my secret, she…y'know, leave."

Grace nodded. "Well, I don't know of any secret that would mess up a relationship where both parties genuinely cared for each other. Unless it was something like you killed someone or you used to be a woman."

Sherlock laughed. "God, nothing that drastic!"

"Well, then, I would go for it. Ask her out. If you think she's trustworthy and really loves you, she wouldn't care. I mean, I wouldn't," Grace finished, fishing the maraschino cherry out of her drink.

Sherlock smiled. "Thanks for your insight," he said.

"Back at you," she grinned.

o.O

At roughly ten, after a dinner and conversation with the pirate and reaper, Lily felt quite pleased with how things were turning out. Once all the desserts disappeared, the tables were swept away and the Beatles song was cut off and replaced with a fast-paced ABBA song. The pirate stood and bowed to her.

"May I have this dance, madam?" he asked. Lily grinned; this guy had been nothing but kind and polite the entire night, not to mention making her laugh constantly. She took his hand happily and was about to follow when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned and saw the reaper.

"Save me one, all right?" he asked. Lily nodded and ran after the pirate.

"You see the Limburger guy?" he asked, nodding to the guy in the cheese costume. Lily stifled a giggle; he was standing in a corner, dancing sporadically with thin air.

"Yeah, I saw him earlier. I wonder what possessed him to purchase that costume?" Lily pondered.

"I do like yours, though. Not at all stinky and moldy," he said. Lily smiled

"Now, that's not very kind," Lily said.

"It's true though. Go smell him."

"Bloody hell, no!" she yelled.

"I dare you."

"No!"

"You chicken?"

"No, but how am I supposed to just waltz over there and…whiff his odor?" The pirate cracked up. "What?" Lily asked. "That was a perfectly logical question!"

"It's just how you said it. Here, I'll help you," the pirate turned her around and the two began dancing toward the cheese guy. Lily had to admit, her partner was a very good dancer and had a refreshing witty sense of humor with a touch of sarcasm. But the reaper…he had monopolized the dinner with his chivalry and charming conversation. Never in her life had Lily had a guy who spent her this much attention, let alone two battling for her affection. This sort of thing happened to Kathleen, not her.

"Did you smell him?" the pirate asked. Lily snapped out of her reverie.

"Smell what?" the cheese guy asked in a high squeaky voice. Lily stifled a giggle and, excusing herself, ran off. She smacked into someone's back.

"Oi!" Lily's victim shouted, turning. It was the reaper, whose cup of pumpkin juice had spilled all over his front. "Are you alright?" he asked as Lily let out a torrent of giggles, falling weakly into the reaper's chest.

"Have you seen the guy dressed up as a hunk of cheese?" she managed. The reaper shook his head. "His voice…is squeaky! Like, did you hear Sirius Black's voice when he had to be Kathleen Jamison's slave?"

"Ah, yes, I get the picture," the reaper said. "Does he smell?"

"You know, I forgot to check," Lily realized.

"Oh well, as long as you're here," the reaper bowed low. "May I have this dance, madam?"

Lily blushed slightly and took his arm as he led her to the dance floor. "Need me to fix your robes?" she offered.

"I'd be obliged," he said. Lily whipped out her wand, muttered a quick spell to dry his front, and grinned up at him.

"Better?" she asked. He lightly tightened his arms around her so Lily was pressed comfortably against his front.

"Much," she heard his chest rumble.

o.O

Three feet away from Lily and the reaper, Kathleen lay snuggled against the phantom's familiar torso, her eyes closed in bliss. His visible, solid arms were wrapped snugly around her waist, tight enough to make her feel secure but not smothered. His chin rest on the top of her head; every so often, it would lower to plant a light kiss on her hair.

She raised her head to look at his masked face. "What, darling?" his deep voice asked huskily.

"It's just…amazing to see you tangible," she murmured.

"So you're fine with not knowing who I am?" he asked.

"I didn't say that," she murmured again, a coy smile on her lips. "I'm sorry I kept pushing you away before," she looked down. The phantom raised her chin with one of his fingers.

"Understandable, darling. I did kind of force myself on you," he said.

"Why did you always hide?" she asked. His hand moved to her neck as he stepped in closer.

"You'll understand at midnight," he muttered. He leaned in for a kiss, his eyes closed. Kathleen kept hers open as she tried to see beyond the white mask that was getting more and more on her nerves. Finally, she gave in and closed them, running her hand though his hair.

He broke apart gently and put his forehead on hers, catching his breath. "Great dance, eh?" he laughed quietly. "Fancy a walk outside?" Kathleen nodded mutely, starting to wonder if her 'date' would ever show himself.

o.O

In the most shadowed corner, far from the cheese man, the pirate sat in his chair scowling into his spiked pumpkin juice. He looked up from the depths of his orange drink and into the gorgeous orange-red hair that was currently tumbling over the reaper's shoulder. The reaper had taken the queen. His queen.

Sighing, he tried to look away. He noted Sherlock, one of the guys he had gotten to know before his queen appeared, was looking quite friendly with a blond goddess. Even though they were dancing to the slow song, they were still talking amongst themselves. Movement by the door caught his eye; the phantom had found what looked like a dead angel and the two were bartering an exit from the Hall. He watched them in distracted interest until they were gone. His eyes wandered involuntarily back to his queen and that damned reaper.

_Thirty minutes to midnight,_ he noted. _I've got to get back in with my queen_.

"Dance with me?" he heard a voice say distantly. The pirate wrenched his eyes away to see a girl dressed as a veela looking adamantly at him.

The pirate shrugged. "Sure," he decided, taking her hand and leading her onto the floor to a spot slightly hidden, but still within watching distance of the cursed couple.

o.O

"All right, students," Dumbledore was onstage. The Hall immediately fell silent. "According to my clock, which I assume is accurate, we have exactly fifteen seconds until midnight. So find that special person and get ready to count it down."

The pirate broke away from the veela girl, blocking out her complaints. He looked around frantically, but couldn't find the queen and the reaper anywhere.

"Ten," the hall reverberated with the students' unanimous voices.

He started darting in between groups, still searching.

"Nine."

He bumped roughly into a girl. "Sorry."

"Eight."

The girl had pushed back and he landed in the punch bowl. "Damn it!" he hissed. He grabbed a handful of napkins and began to mop himself off.

"Seven…Six…Five…"

"Eurgh! Scourgify!" the pirate yelled in frustration. His costume cleared and he struggled to his feet.

"Four."

Finally, he caught a smidgen of red hair in the corner of his eye. He turned to face it; there was the queen, counting down with an excited look on her face.

"Three."

Unfortunately he had to go through a deep throng of people.

"Two."

"BLOODY HELL, MOVE!" the pirate bellowed. Slowly the people shifted.

"One."

He could see his queen clearly. All that was left was to shove that assfig reaper out of the way and…

BONG went the great clock outside. In one fluid motion, all the masks in the room were lifted and thrown into the air.

o.O

Outside, the phantom and Kathleen had been talking when the clock went off. Kathleen jumped and looked toward the clock. It was midnight. Finally.

"Well, you know who I am," Kathleen said, ripping off her mask. She turned to the phantom with a degree of eagerness. Her fingers were already inching toward his face when he caught them.

"Before you do," his voice warbled with fear, "kiss me one more time."

"Why?" Kathleen whined impatiently.

"Please," he begged. "I want one more moment of bliss in case you hate who I am."

Kathleen obliged and her lips were caught in the familiar grip of his. She felt his need and lust pour into her; it shocked her so that she couldn't move, even though his hands were no longer holding her hands. She reveled in the wave of emotion washing over until the suspense built so that she couldn't wait a second longer.

Slowly her fingers inched toward his face and found the edge of his mask. The phantom flinched slightly at her touch, his expert kissing hesitating. She moved her hands to his hair and kissed him, trying to build him back up. But he wouldn't oblige. He broke apart slightly, took her hands, and placed them back on his mask before kissing her lightly. Watching through her eyelashes, she pushed the mask off his closed eyes until it fell to the ground. She heard him swallow hard and broke away for the last time.

It was Sirius.

His usually sarcastic smirk was replaced with a look she couldn't read. His confidant yet haughty posture was replaced with the hunched, shy posture of someone who had just gotten called out on a guilty secret pleasure. His eyes were searching Kathleen's anxiously.

"Shocked?" he grinned sadly.

That was an understatement. Kathleen's eyes had gone wide, her face deathly pale and stony. She looked like a deer stuck in headlights. Slowly, she stood and walked off. Sirius stood quickly and went after her.

"Kathleen?" he called. The mentioned broke into a light run and disappeared, leaving Sirius standing alone.

o.O

"Remus?" Grace squawked.

"Surprise," he said, grinning half-heartedly. There was silence between the two.

"I…I literally don't know what to say," Grace said.

"Then I'll talk," Remus said. "All night I've been hoping you were the goddess I've been talking too. The truth is, I meant everything I've said to you all night. I have liked this girl for a long time but I don't know how she will react to my secret."

"And…I'm…?"

"Yeah," Remus said, turning a brilliant shade of pink.

"You're not a girl or anything, are you?" Grace asked.

Remus gave a sort of exhale/laugh of anxiety. "No, I'm…I'm a werewolf."

Silence.

"That's it?"

Remus looked incredulously at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, geez, Remus! I thought you killed a man or something. You being a…"

"Shh!" he hushed her, looking around warily.

"…werewolf," she whispered as she continued, "well, it's slightly anticlimactic."

More silence.

"So you're not freaked out?" Grace shook her head. "Wow, you're taking it about as easily as Kathleen did."

"Kathleen knows?" Grace said in shock.

"Yeah, all the Marauders know about it. Come to think of it, none of my mates really freaked when they figured it out."

"That's because we know the real you and aren't bigoted freaks," Kathleen said, coming up beside Grace. "So you know all about Remus' furry little problem?"

"That's the furry problem?" Grace laughed. "There's no manic kitten?"

"Well, yes there is, but Remus doesn't like when I call Tabitha the tabby cat a manic," Kathleen smiled. Remus rolled his eyes but smiled in turn. "Well, I'll let you two get back to it. I'm sure you have a lot to discuss. As you were." She started to walk off. "Oh, and if you see Sirius, I'm not here," she called back.

o.O

Lily lifted the reaper's mask. He lifted hers.

Mitchell stood in front of her.

He was the reaper.

"Lily?" Mitchell said, a smile on his face.

"Yep," Lily said looking around. She wanted to find the pirate.

"This is unbelievable. I had a good time with you," he said.

"Me too," Lily said. Mitchell put out his arms for a hug. Lily accepted, but kept looking.

Finally, she noticed a solitary figure standing to her left, still masked. She turned to face him; it was the pirate. Slowly, his fingers reached up to his mask and peeled it away painstakingly slow. Lily's eyes widened as she recognized the face.

_Potter. _

James had an unreadable expression on his face, a cross of hurt, longing, fury, and loss. He swallowed visibly, nodded to her, and walked away.

Mitchell broke away. He was saying something, but nothing registered in Lily's mind. Only one thought.

_Potter._

o.O

A/N: Don't hate me.

i'm sorry.

Mitchell likes to stick his nose where it doesn't belong.

He'll get what he deserves. And trust me, your hatred for him is just brewing...

next chappie is basically written. and i PROMISE no more waiting a year for an update. this coming chappie IS my fav so far. James gets pissy, Sirius uses humor to mask his personal demons, Kathleen deals with her double agent status and may or may not sacrifice her own feelings for the good of the majority, and Grace and Remus are rather cute.

please review. They keep me happy.


	12. Aftermath

sooooo it's been a while. sorry! i just got settled into college.

so idk how many people still read this thing. i'm seriously considering deleting this story and working on it for a while longer then reposting it. actually, i'm thinking of doing that with the majority of my stories. i just think then i could work at my own pace then, when i have more written, i can adhere to a stricter posting schedule. plus, i'm a film major and my work load is TREMENDOUS. hehe. so yeah, feedback is appreciated.

btw. my fav. chapter. of all time.

Disclaimer: it's been said. refer to past chapters.

Ch. 12: Aftermath

James was no longer hurt. He was fuming.

"Where…the hell…is Jamison?" he said to Sirius in a measured tone.

"Like I know," Sirius said bitterly.

"Don't play dumb with me, Padfoot. I know you and her were together the entire dance and don't think I missed you two leaving," James grabbed Sirius' cape threateningly.

"Mate, she ran off," Sirius said, swatting his hand away. "No touchie. She just pulled this really weird face like," Sirius did a very distorted version of a bulgy-eyed Trelawney faking a deathly vision, "and took off toward the castle. No touchie the capie!"

James let go of Sirius, but not because Sirius commanded him to; Lily and Mitchell were walking hand-in-hand up to the Tower. He followed them with his eyes, wishing that every step that girl-stealing bastard took would send him tumbling to his death. From beside him, he heard Sirius whistle faintly.

"Bad luck, Prongs. Looks like Kathleen's brilliant idea wasn't as brilliant as we thought," Sirius said, clapping James on the back in what he meant to be a sympathetic manner. James lurched forward a step, causing his glare to break, as well as the nonverbal hex he was about to place on Mitchell. James glanced at Sirius poisonously.

"You see why I need Jamison? To tell her off and see if she has any other so-called brilliant schemes for me," James said, rubbing his sore shoulder. Sirius, however, was more preoccupied with the two people who had just emerged from the Hall. It was Grace and Remus, smiling as they walked up to the two boys, holding hands.

"Whoo, Moony!" Sirius clapped Remus on the back in what he thought was a congratulatory manner. Yet again, the force of Sirius' hit knocked the wind out of the poor Remus. The boy doubled up coughing roughly. "Geez, mate, too much dancing?" Sirius said, helping Remus up.

"Bloody…hell," Remus gasped. "For everyone's health…never, clap anyone on the back again.."

"Why? It's my form of expressing sentiment!" Sirius said simply. "Hey!" he said, turning to an innocent Hufflepuff bystander, "great dance, eh?" He raised his hand, ready to smack the boy, but both James and Remus lunged forward, yelling "No!", and grabbed Sirius and pulled him away.

"As you were," Grace said to the Hufflepuff, who ran off in fear of the boys' sanity.

"So," Sirius said conversationally as he brushed himself off and getting to his feet, "either you two seen Kathleen? Me and James are looking for her."

"Er, actually, we were just talking to her in the Hall…" Remus said, starting to stand, but James pushed him down as he sped off into the Great Hall. "…and now he's gone."

"He _really_ needs to talk to her," Sirius said.

"Ah," Remus nodded. Stepping over to Grace, he offered her the crook of his arm. "Walk you to your dorm?"

"Well…" Grace trailed, taking it, "I don't mean to put you out or anything…"

"I'm sure it's on the way," Remus smiled and the two started up the same route Lily and Mitchell had taken previously.

"So…I'll just stay here, shall I?" Sirius said to no one in particular. No one in particular answered. "Yep," Sirius swung his arms absently and sat down against the wall. The bass from the last song of the dance boomed through the floor and into his back. He began bobbing his head in time idly, looking at the milling students in haughty boredom.

A blur of white, grey, and black ran out of the dance at top speed and stopped behind a pedestal and vase ten paces from Sirius. It was Kathleen, still in her fallen angel costume. She was breathing heavily, as if she had just outrun a pissed centaur. Her back was to Sirius as she monitored the exit door.

"Er…hey," Sirius spoke up quizzically. Kathleen jumped, sending the vase plummeting to the floor. Her Quidditch instincts kicked in; she whipped out her wand and yelled an incantation, making the vase float a centimeter from the floor. "Nice catch," Sirius complemented her as she picked it up and set it right.

"Someone should really glue those sorts of things in place," Kathleen said, looking everywhere but at Sirius.

"Can we talk?" Sirius said, standing.

"No," Kathleen said, glancing over her shoulder. Her eyes widened as she spotted James' familiar untidy head storming toward her.

"Please," Sirius begged, but it was no use: Kathleen was already leaping over the banister and taking the stairs three at a time. James went up to Sirius and grabbed his collar, raising him slightly into the air.

"Why didn't you come and get me when she showed up?" he fumed.

"Bloody hell, Prongs! Let me go!" Sirius yelled, punching James in the face. "Sorry. Instinct," he apologized as James nursed a bloody nose. Sirius siphoned off the blood and magically mended his nose with a flick of his wand. "She just ran out of the dance and ran off again. She wouldn't talk to me."

"She seems to be doing a lot of that lately."

"What? Running? Not talking?"

"Yes."

"Yes to what? The running or the not talking?" Sirius said, but James was halfway up the stairs and out of earshot. "Bloody hell, what is making these stairs such a popular getaway?" he said, rolling his eyes as he followed.

o.O

Sirius finally caught up with the raging James at the foot of the girls' case.

"She's up there," James said.

"Okay," Sirius said. "Mind, she does have a right. I mean, where else would she sleep?"

"Shut it. I need to get up there."

"To shag her brains out?"

"To talk to her, tosser."

"Oh, right. Shagging brains out is my category." James was silent, still staring at the stairs in front of him. "And how do you propose getting up there? Because, correct me if I'm wrong, guys aren't allowed on the girls' case. And I don't think glaring will make the stairs change their mind."

James tore his eyes away and ran up the boys' case. Sirius shouted after. "Oi, mate! Wrong stairs!" James emerged on the landing a few seconds later, his broom in hand. "Oh," Sirius said, understanding what James was doing. James kicked off and flew across the room and up the girls' case, landing in front of the seventh-years dormitory. Without knocking, he burst in.

"Bloody hell!" Lily exclaimed, sitting up on her bed quickly. "James?"

"Where's Jamison?" James demanded.

"Shower," she said, lying back down.

"I have to talk to her!" he yelled.

"Too bloody bad. I'll tell her you stopped by, though," Lily said, turning away from him.

Just then, Grace stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in pajama pants and a cami. She froze at the sight of the boys.

"Damn," Lily cursed quietly.

"You wanna tell us where Kathleen really is?" James asked.

Right on cue, something in the closet sneezed.

"Damn," Lily cursed again.

"Your wardrobe's sneezing," Sirius pointed out.

"That's our pet boggart," Grace fibbed quickly.

"Well, I'll just get rid of it for you, then," James seethed. He stalked over to the foresaid piece of furniture and opened it, revealing a very sheepish Kathleen.

"Oh, look. The boggart worked in reverse. It's seeing the very last thing _it_ wants to see," Kathleen said bitterly. "Closet needs dusting," she said to Lily. James dragged her out and pushed her toward the door.

"What are you doing?" Lily was sitting up again, wand in hand.

"Like I said. I'm getting rid of your boggart," James said bitterly.

"I have half a mind to get McGonnagall!" Lily threatened.

"Don't worry, Lils," Kathleen said subdued, "I'll be back in a bit."

"Bullshit," James muttered, slamming the door behind him. "Our dorm. Now." He roughly pushed her out the door, slammed it shut, and drug her down the stairs.

"Is this how you treat all your girls?" Kathleen questioned once they were on the boys' landing. "Maybe that's why Lily hates you."

"No, she hates me because your plan sucked," James seethed.

"Oh, no, don't you remember? She hated you long before tonight," Kathleen smirked.

"Don't you think you should be a bit nicer, mate?" Sirius said, scaling the stairs after James and his hostage.

"Shut it. Both of you," James snapped. Kathleen threw Sirius a half-smile pitiful look. "Inside," James pushed open the seventh-year boys' dorm and roughly shoved her in.

There was only one light in the room, the lamp beside Remus' bed, said boy reading a thick novel. He shut the volume and looked confusedly at the girl. "Kathleen?" he asked, slightly drowsy.

"Hey Moony," Kathleen said in a voice that tried to be cheerful and pleasant. She scratched the back of her neck nervously.

"Want a chair?" Sirius offered, tossing a stack of books, parchments, and robes off a desk chair and rolling it over to her.

"Thanks," she said as she drew her right leg up to her chest in a half-crossed sitting position

"No speaking to the accused," James snapped, stalking over to Kathleen, who looked reproachfully up at him. "You want to explain what happened tonight?"

"What do you mean?" Kathleen shifted uneasily, her eyes darting to Sirius nervously.

"Are you that daft? Did you totally miss the disaster that is unfolding between Lily and Mitchell?" James was ready to blow.

"Oh that," Kathleen said, her confidence building.

"Yes, that," James mocked. "I'd love to hear your views on the subject. And while you're at it, you can explain why you're running from Sirius."

"James…" Remus sighed, looking empathetically at Kathleen.

"Don't drag me into this, mate," Sirius said warily.

"The situation was out of my hands, Prongs," Kathleen said, her eyes closed helplessly.

"Really? So you admit this plan was out of control and you didn't do anything about it?" James jumped at her.

"And how was I supposed to know Mitchell would interfere? I'm not a bloody Seer, James!"

"This whole plan was a chance effort, but you guaranteed it. You guaranteed that, if I was pleasant and didn't piss Lily off, she'd be in front of me at midnight and ready to date me. I upheld my part of the deal, but you failed me."

"Don't you _dare_ put words in my mouth!" Kathleen exclaimed, standing. "I never guaranteed anything, but that Lily would stop hating you guts so much and I did that. She actually has whole conversations with you without wanting to hex your guts out and may even consider you a fond…acquaintance."

"This was a plan to get Lily to date me, Jamison, not get me another bloody friend!" James bellowed.

"Well, pardon me for not controlling the world and all its occupants!" Kathleen screamed, storming out of the dorm, letting the door slam behind her.

o.O

Running out of the Tower, she ran until she was in front of a portrait of Rudelpoh the Risky, who was pictured falling off a cliff. She tapped it and it moved aside, revealing a dusty reading room, outfitted with a window seat that overlooked the moonlit grounds. She snatched the fleece blanket that sat on the said seat and curled up under it and cried.

She sat there quietly, tears rolling down her cheeks, for what seemed like twenty minutes. An invisible hand suddenly roosted itself on Kathleen's shoulder. She gasped and looked away, drying her eyes quickly and regaining herself. "I know it's you, Sirius," she said in a steady voice, looking where he was. A counter curse was muttered and Sirius appeared, looking down at her worriedly.

"You all right?" he asked gently.

"I'm fine. Just leave me alone," her voice trembled, looking out the window again.

"Your eyes are red. Like you've been crying," he pointed out.

"Allergy attack," she said.

Sirius sat down beside her. "I'm sorry about James. He's a bit touchy on the subject. Remus is trying to calm him down and keep him from kicking you off the Quidditch team.

"Oh god," Kathleen choked tearfully. She buried her face in her blanketed arms and shook from fresh sobs. Sirius rubbed her shoulder.

"It's all right, darling," he said soothingly. "He won't kick you off. He's just temporarily mental. Once he comes to his senses, he'll realize that we're the best Beaters he'll ever try out."

"I've screwed up everything, Sirius," Kathleen sobbed, her voice slightly muffled from the fabric. "From the start, even before they started planning, I meant to find out what Lily's costume was and follow her all night and make sure she was with James the entire night. If only I had done that, Lily and James would be together right now and James wouldn't hate my guts right now."

"But then I came along and distracted you," Sirius said quietly. Kathleen raised her tear-stained face. "If I hadn't accosted you in the hall, you would have spent all night with Lily and been able to set the two up." He was silent, then smacked the wall furiously with his fist. "This is all my fault."

"No, Sirius," Kathleen reprimanded him, snuggling into his shoulder, "it's not your fault. Even if you hadn't come up to me in the dance, I didn't know James' costume so I couldn't have set them up." Kathleen sat up. "But now that you've brought the subject up, why have you been, as you poetically said, accosting me?"

Sirius shifted nervously. "Er…I've been having these reoccurring dreams…involving you."

"Do I want to hear this?" Kathleen interrupted, her stomach turning nervously.

"Er…" Sirius looked sheepish, "you probably should. It started out pretty innocent, kissing and that sort of thing. But then they started getting a bit more, er…erotic," he said quietly. Kathleen's eyes went wide. "Anyway, I got this crazy idea that if I…reenacted some of the dreams, they'd go away."

"Which dreams did you mean to reenact?" Kathleen asked, blushing slightly in the moonlight. Sirius looked away, swallowing hard.

"Um…I was willing to go as far as needed," he whispered.

Kathleen closed her eyes and desperately tried not to laugh. She had a feeling this was definitely the wrong time for that. "You wanted them to go away? Were they that bad?" she managed to keep a straight face.

"No! It's not that!" Sirius insisted. "They were actually quite nice and…pleasurable," he said, shifting again. Kathleen gave a snort of laughter.

"Sorry," she said, covering her smile with a hand. With a deep breath, she recovered and emerged with a serious face. "So you disillusioned yourself and started…'accosting' me," she prompted.

"Well, what was I supposed to do? Go up to you randomly, say 'Hey let's shag so I can stop dreaming about you'?" Sirius said.

Kathleen couldn't hold back; she burst out in laughter. Sirius chuckled a bit himself. "I really am sorry," Kathleen breathed. "Whew! Back on topic…" she shook her head. "If you were so adamant, why'd you stop when I asked?"

"I guess my upstairs brain finally caught up with me," Sirius said. "I couldn't bring myself to take advantage of you. I wanted you to want it as much as I did."

"Very gentlemanly of you," she said. "Have the dreams stopped?"

"No," Sirius said quietly. "Well, not completely. It's not every night like it used to be. It's more of a weekly occurrence." Silence. "To be perfectly honest, they scared me. I thought someone had put a Love Spell or something on me."

"I'd be slightly disturbed if I randomly started having nightly erotic dreams too," Kathleen said.

"But I wasn't disturbed. And it wasn't a bad scared. It was just…I think I love you," Sirius blurted. "You're not going to run again, are you?" he asked, looking into her eyes for the first time since they started talking.

Kathleen's eyes were wide. Honestly, the idea had crossed her mind, but she couldn't bring her feet to move. So she shook her head silently. Sirius waited for her to say something but, realizing she was speechless, continued on.

"I…I dunno. I've never felt like this. I mean, I've dated girls and I've said 'I love you' and I thought I meant it. But now, if I ever see you even talking to another guy, I have this overwhelming urge to run up and…I dunno, either punch him or snog you. I started to look forward and plan my 'accostings', if that's a word, during class and…" Sirius trailed off and gave a slight laugh.

"What?" Kathleen asked, finding her voice.

"I just wondered if this is how James feels around Lily," he said. He looked at her, examining her face for some positive sign. "What do you say?" he asked anxiously.

Kathleen gave a great sight. "After tonight…Sirius, I can't handle all this right now," she moaned. "I'm really sorry. Under different circumstances, I could give you a proper answer, but…"

"No, I understand," Sirius said, failing to hide his disappointment. Kathleen looked at him pitifully.

"Sirius," she dragged his name out. "At least let me sleep on it, okay? My head is killing me and I'm dead tired. Maybe in the morning I'll be back to normal."

"Did you drink the juice?" Sirius asked randomly.

"Probably," Kathleen yawned.

"It was spiked."

Kathleen sat up sharply. "You didn't!"

"No. I think it was the cheese guy," Sirius said. "He looked shifty."

"Ah," she said, resting her head on his chest. "Who was the cheese guy anyway?"

"I heard it was Snape."

"I could see that. You mind if I stay here until I get my bearings? I suppose the alcohol's kicking in."

"Sure," Sirius said, leaning back against the wall. Kathleen buried her head in his chest as Sirius pulled his cape over her and the blanket over both them. She closed her eyes peacefully, feeling herself slowly slip out of consciousness but not having the energy to get up. She shifted slightly and smiled as Sirius' arms tightened around her protectively. Her sleepy brain was still buzzing over the Sirius subject. She had casually fantasized about this day for about a year, if she and Sirius for some reason did decide to date. She always expected to say yes and was ready to at the unmasking, but something held her back. Perhaps it was Lily's feelings toward the Marauders; she could tolerate Kathleen's friendship with them, but had a feeling Lily would have something to say about dating one of them. _Deal with it in the morning_, the voice of reason said in her head. Kathleen obeyed and dozed off.

Sirius was watching Kathleen in silent awe. Her eyes were closed but her brows would twitch into a frown every so often, showing she wasn't quite rested. He brushed her arm with his hand absently and it seemed to soothe her. He grinned in spite of himself. _Padfoot, old mate, you're going soft_, a voice said in his head. _She's worth it_, he told the voice.

o.O

aww how adorable was that. puke. hehe

so yeah, like i said before, let me know if you are dedicated to this story and would be completely heartbroken if it came down for...about a year. i'm planning on revamping everything right now.

reviews PLEASE! they keep me sane. and i need it. i'm thousands of miles from home here and going slightly off my rocker.


End file.
